Difference between revisions of "Socializing And Natural Hygiene"
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# Food Combining Demonstration | # Food Combining Demonstration | ||
# How to Plan Meals | # How to Plan Meals | ||
− | You will probably have to carry the load for a while, perhaps for the first two or three meetings. After that, it is time to start assigning topics. Get lists of the available tapes from Life Science or from the American Natural Hygiene Society. These are valuable and can be used at your meetings to fill in gaps and to provide useful information to your guests. The tapes may be used to supplement presentations by yourself or by one of the guests who consents to make a presentation. | + | You will probably have to carry the load for a while, perhaps for the first two or three meetings. After that, it is time to start assigning topics. Get lists of the available tapes from Life Science or from the American Natural Hygiene Society. These are valuable and can be used at your meetings to fill in gaps and to provide useful information to your guests. The tapes may be used to supplement presentations by yourself or by one of the guests who consents to make a presentation. |
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+ | Throughout your many lessons there are numerous topics of interest and also discussions by experienced practitioners on specific subjects. These short articles often provide very valuable information. They can be reproduced and a copy given to each guest or they can be read to the guests present. The idea is to choose subjects of general interest or of intrinsic worth, to line up articles and/or discussions which develop the theme, to have tapes that pertain to the topic; in general, to tie the whole meeting together in such a way that there are no awkward gaps. Your guests should leave well rewarded for their time. They should have enjoyed the fellowship and learned something of value. | ||
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+ | When they do, they are only too eager to return again and again. | ||
=== Sealing Friendships within the Group === | === Sealing Friendships within the Group === | ||
− | Most people are lonely in some way or other. Many Hygienists feel lonely—set apart. Meetings such as we have described provide an ideal setting for everyone to have an opportunity to find a friend or to make many friends. The host or hostess can play a useful role here. | + | Most people are lonely in some way or other. Many Hygienists feel lonely—set apart. Meetings such as we have described provide an ideal setting for everyone to have an opportunity to find a friend or to make many friends. The host or hostess can play a useful role here. |
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+ | At every meeting guests should be made to feel that, as host or hostess, you are delighted to see them. For this moment the idea is to make each guest the center of attention. | ||
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+ | Dr. Elizabeth gives every person who comes to the ranch on these occasions a hug and a kiss. They love it. After one or two meetings, indeed, they expect it and so does she! | ||
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+ | Both of us try to impart a sense of mutual love and respect. Not everyone is outgoing at first, but with practice, everyone can become more warm and outgoing.Within the group is one person, or even a whole group of persons, who think you are somebody and do not hesitate to show it. | ||
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+ | Rid yourself of surface comparisons. Encourage, yourself and your guests to be interested in life and each other. Learn to live through talking, listening and sharing. Use your own loving talent. Plant the seed of love, of mutual caring and respect for others by your example—and watch your harvest grow. | ||
=== Don’t Try Too Hard === | === Don’t Try Too Hard === | ||
− | Strive to put your guests at ease, but don’t strive too hard: avoid artificiality. Offer love, friendship and knowledge to your guests. Don’t be afraid to go more than half-way, especially at first and perhaps even the second meeting. Express sincere interest in your guests person and well-being. | + | Strive to put your guests at ease, but don’t strive too hard: avoid artificiality. Offer love, friendship and knowledge to your guests. Don’t be afraid to go more than half-way, especially at first and perhaps even the second meeting. Express sincere interest in your guests person and well-being. |
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+ | Don’t forget the round-the-room introductions at every gathering. Do this when your guests have settled. At times, or even every time, you can ask your guests to tell something about themselves as for example, how they learned about Life Science or how they | ||
became interested in learning about natural methods of health care, or about their hobbies, or special talents, or feelings, or whatever? Be sure to admire and inquire. | became interested in learning about natural methods of health care, or about their hobbies, or special talents, or feelings, or whatever? Be sure to admire and inquire. | ||
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=== When Your Group Becomes Too Large === | === When Your Group Becomes Too Large === | ||
− | Sometimes a few friends can grow into many and your group becomes so large that your home or the home of participants can no longer accommodate them. Then it is wise and timely either to divide into two or more splinter groups or to move to a public | + | Sometimes a few friends can grow into many and your group becomes so large that your home or the home of participants can no longer accommodate them. Then it is wise and timely either to divide into two or more splinter groups or to move to a public meeting place. |
Community rooms are usually available in most areas, provided either by the city or town (for example, the town hall), by churches, lodges, by savings and loan companies, by the larger health food stores, and so on. The local chamber of commerce can often provide names and locations of such meeting rooms, as can the city or country recreation departments. | Community rooms are usually available in most areas, provided either by the city or town (for example, the town hall), by churches, lodges, by savings and loan companies, by the larger health food stores, and so on. The local chamber of commerce can often provide names and locations of such meeting rooms, as can the city or country recreation departments. | ||
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For economic reasons most clients cannot be expected to keep paying in dollars and cents for repeated consultations. Unlike the medical doctor, the Hygienist will have an almost 100% recovery experience among clients. In fact, in many cases, recovery will be so spectacular that clients will be able to depart from guidance within a few months certain, in their minds at least, that they have acquired sufficient knowledge to enable them to continue their forward progress without further guidance from the practitioner. | For economic reasons most clients cannot be expected to keep paying in dollars and cents for repeated consultations. Unlike the medical doctor, the Hygienist will have an almost 100% recovery experience among clients. In fact, in many cases, recovery will be so spectacular that clients will be able to depart from guidance within a few months certain, in their minds at least, that they have acquired sufficient knowledge to enable them to continue their forward progress without further guidance from the practitioner. | ||
− | For this reason, the practitioner must have some method or methods of providing a steady feeding-in of potential clients. Group meetings of clients, their families, and | + | For this reason, the practitioner must have some method or methods of providing a steady feeding-in of potential clients. Group meetings of clients, their families, and invited friends can provide such a pool. |
− | In the beginning such meetings can take place either in the office setting or be hosted in your own home. These first meetings should be purely professional in intent, to | + | In the beginning such meetings can take place either in the office setting or be hosted in your own home. These first meetings should be purely professional in intent, to provide reinforcement beyond individual counselling. These meetings are not open to the general public. They do provide a time, albeit brief, for some important socializing, for getting clients to understand that other persons exist who also have problems and, most importantly, that you as a practitioner care enough to give this extra time and without charge. |
At times a practitioner who has speaking talents may wish to start a club or group similar to that which we have already discussed. These meetings should, of course, be open to the public. Again, at the discretion of the individual practitioner, they may be held either in his/her home, at the home of a willing client, or at a public community room. | At times a practitioner who has speaking talents may wish to start a club or group similar to that which we have already discussed. These meetings should, of course, be open to the public. Again, at the discretion of the individual practitioner, they may be held either in his/her home, at the home of a willing client, or at a public community room. | ||
− | The invitations may be on the personal level (telephone or mail), conveyed by flyers to the public (distributed by cooperative students), and also by notices placed in the | + | The invitations may be on the personal level (telephone or mail), conveyed by flyers to the public (distributed by cooperative students), and also by notices placed in the public press: Sometimes local radio stations will provide time for a short announcement particularly when the topic to be discussed is of general interest. |
Lecture groups of this kind also provide a pool of potential clients but, additionally, they provide an opportunity for socializing. Students and clients are often delighted to be asked to share their experiences with the public. Following the lecture, the practitioner should always provide a time for questions and answers. If you don’t know the answer, say so frankly and then try to find the answer and communicate to the questioner. So, be sure to alert one of your students to write down the name and address of such inquirers. | Lecture groups of this kind also provide a pool of potential clients but, additionally, they provide an opportunity for socializing. Students and clients are often delighted to be asked to share their experiences with the public. Following the lecture, the practitioner should always provide a time for questions and answers. If you don’t know the answer, say so frankly and then try to find the answer and communicate to the questioner. So, be sure to alert one of your students to write down the name and address of such inquirers. | ||
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=== You Don’t Always Have to “Wing It” Alone === | === You Don’t Always Have to “Wing It” Alone === | ||
− | The practitioner doesn’t always have to “wing it” alone. Tapes may be used or guest speakers invited. Don’t be bashful about asking worthy speakers to come and address your group. Most of them will be most gracious and willing to come at their own | + | The practitioner doesn’t always have to “wing it” alone. Tapes may be used or guest speakers invited. Don’t be bashful about asking worthy speakers to come and address your group. Most of them will be most gracious and willing to come at their own expense. As a general rule we take our guest speakers out for dinner following the meeting. |
If a guest speaker is not available and you have been too busy to prepare a topic, do what we have done occasionally: have a “Show and Tell” party. For such occasions we like to meet at a home or at a community room with facilities for serving refreshments. | If a guest speaker is not available and you have been too busy to prepare a topic, do what we have done occasionally: have a “Show and Tell” party. For such occasions we like to meet at a home or at a community room with facilities for serving refreshments. | ||
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=== Special Parties === | === Special Parties === | ||
− | There are many occasions amenable to socializing. We hold parties to celebrate birthdays. We hold parties just to get together with friends. Last year we had a party on Christmas Day for our students. Most years we have our own private plans for the | + | There are many occasions amenable to socializing. We hold parties to celebrate birthdays. We hold parties just to get together with friends. Last year we had a party on Christmas Day for our students. Most years we have our own private plans for the holidays but last year, we knew we would be at home on Christmas, so we decided to have a party! |
We knew that some of our local students have no families. We knew also that those persons who do have families rarely extend the hand of hospitality to persons outside of the immediate family group. Personally we feel that we have an extended family, one that consists of our students around the globe. So, we sent out the word: “Come to the ranch and spend Christmas day with us!” We made the occasion a pot-luck dinner, of course. We are not ones to seek after additional work! | We knew that some of our local students have no families. We knew also that those persons who do have families rarely extend the hand of hospitality to persons outside of the immediate family group. Personally we feel that we have an extended family, one that consists of our students around the globe. So, we sent out the word: “Come to the ranch and spend Christmas day with us!” We made the occasion a pot-luck dinner, of course. We are not ones to seek after additional work! | ||
− | On the happy day we had the Christmas tree lights glowing, Christmas candles, | + | On the happy day we had the Christmas tree lights glowing, Christmas candles, flowers and tinsel everywhere. And even Brandy was all dressed up for the celebration with a big red bow attached to his collar. |
Everybody was asked to bring an inexpensive gift and to mark it as being a gift for a man or a womans if applicable. Additionally, guests were asked to bring a gift suitable for an elderly person. We planned to present them to the elderly members of the Tucson Yaqui Indian tribe. We were overwhelmed! | Everybody was asked to bring an inexpensive gift and to mark it as being a gift for a man or a womans if applicable. Additionally, guests were asked to bring a gift suitable for an elderly person. We planned to present them to the elderly members of the Tucson Yaqui Indian tribe. We were overwhelmed! | ||
− | We had fifteen guests that day but gifts for the Indians poured in from many | + | We had fifteen guests that day but gifts for the Indians poured in from many unexpected sources. The manager of the produce department of a local Gemco store with the cooperation of the store manager brought us several large boxes of oranges, tangerines and grapefruit. Students who could not attend sent or brought gifts of all kinds: food, clothing, nonsense gifts and practical gifts. In fact, the number of gifts was so large that one of the heads of the tribe had to bring a truck to carry it all back to the Yaqui Center. |
And what a time we all had. A Christmas to remember. The food was great. We sang Christmas carols. Dr. Robert played his violin, even though he was out of practice. We had all socialized! | And what a time we all had. A Christmas to remember. The food was great. We sang Christmas carols. Dr. Robert played his violin, even though he was out of practice. We had all socialized! | ||
− | Pick your occasion. Dr. Robert’s birthday is on New Year’s day. Of course, that’s an occasion to merit a party when we are in town. Why not a Halloween party? | + | Pick your occasion. Dr. Robert’s birthday is on New Year’s day. Of course, that’s an occasion to merit a party when we are in town. Why not a Halloween party? Thanksgiving time is a lonely occasion for many family-less people. Have a Senior Citizen Party. Guests must be 55 or over. There are ideas without end. You can come up with a few of your own. Partying is fun. Your clients are inclined, many of them, to have periods of depression. A party can be very therapeutic for such as these. A party can provide a time to relax, to have fun, to enjoy knowing your students as persons, to make friends out of faces and cases. And parties provide an opportunity for your clients to know you better, too, as a socially-inclined person, as they meet you out of your office and in a friendly, warm setting. |
=== Entertaining Out of the Home === | === Entertaining Out of the Home === | ||
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For elaborate entertaining, if you are not restricted economically, you may arrange for special dinners at a better restaurant, one of your choosing. For such an occasion, you | For elaborate entertaining, if you are not restricted economically, you may arrange for special dinners at a better restaurant, one of your choosing. For such an occasion, you | ||
− | must decide on a menu and make arrangements with the maitre d’hotel of the restaurant or with the restaurant (or hotel) manager at the place chosen. In making such | + | must decide on a menu and make arrangements with the maitre d’hotel of the restaurant or with the restaurant (or hotel) manager at the place chosen. In making such arrangements, you must spell out the menu you have selected item by item making sure that your contact understands that all food is to be fresh, neither frozen nor canned, if at all possible. The exact time at which dinner is to be served must also be understood by the party with whom you are making arrangements, by you and, of course, by your invited guests. |
− | You may wish to have a little gift of flowers for the ladies. Arrangements for either home delivery or delivery to the table can be made; or simply bulk delivery to the | + | You may wish to have a little gift of flowers for the ladies. Arrangements for either home delivery or delivery to the table can be made; or simply bulk delivery to the restaurant in your name. If the latter, then the host makes the presentation to the ladies who are present at an appropriate time, preferably at the table just prior to the serving. |
− | But, you need not be so formal nor need you be so lavish in your entertaining. | + | But, you need not be so formal nor need you be so lavish in your entertaining. Inviting your friends to meet you at a restaurant of your choosing that normally features a well-stocked salad bar with a variety of salads can be fun, too. If the restaurant serves baked potatoes “on the side,” you are doubly fortunate. |
Many of the better steak houses boast excellent salad bars and almost all serve baked potatoes. Call ahead of time and choose your restaurant before issuing your invitations. Know precisely what kind of a menu is featured before you all get to the restaurant only to find nothing on the menu suitable for a practicing Hygienist to eat! | Many of the better steak houses boast excellent salad bars and almost all serve baked potatoes. Call ahead of time and choose your restaurant before issuing your invitations. Know precisely what kind of a menu is featured before you all get to the restaurant only to find nothing on the menu suitable for a practicing Hygienist to eat! | ||
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Some restaurants will be happy to provide your special choices for a small additional charge, too, so keep this in mind. Inquire around and be prepared for those occasions when you don’t care to host a party in your own home. Then all that will be required of you is to put on your best smile and meet your friends at the place of choice. Because you have made the arrangements ahead of time, all you have to do at this kind of party is to enjoy yourself! | Some restaurants will be happy to provide your special choices for a small additional charge, too, so keep this in mind. Inquire around and be prepared for those occasions when you don’t care to host a party in your own home. Then all that will be required of you is to put on your best smile and meet your friends at the place of choice. Because you have made the arrangements ahead of time, all you have to do at this kind of party is to enjoy yourself! | ||
− | Of course the food won’t be strictly Hygienic. You and your guests are well aware of this fact. But, often the enjoyment of spending a few hours away from our daily | + | Of course the food won’t be strictly Hygienic. You and your guests are well aware of this fact. But, often the enjoyment of spending a few hours away from our daily responsibilities will more than offset any minor defects in a single meal. |
== Respecting Private Spacing == | == Respecting Private Spacing == | ||
− | Every human likes his own space. Around each one of us is an invisible boundary which must not be rudely violated. We know one Hygienist whom everybody avoids. This | + | Every human likes his own space. Around each one of us is an invisible boundary which must not be rudely violated. We know one Hygienist whom everybody avoids. This person is lovely to look at, bright and eager to please and learn, but she has a major fault. She attempts to enter, without permission, into everybody’s private space. |
This woman is never content with a “No!” Nor is she rebuffed by other kinds of negative responses. When people turn away from her, she will make a point of loudly asking, “Why?” Why do you do this to me? Don’t you want me around?” She will go on and on asking why, how and where and keep on inquiring even though your answers may be evasive. | This woman is never content with a “No!” Nor is she rebuffed by other kinds of negative responses. When people turn away from her, she will make a point of loudly asking, “Why?” Why do you do this to me? Don’t you want me around?” She will go on and on asking why, how and where and keep on inquiring even though your answers may be evasive. | ||
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Remember that a sharp tongue is an asset to no one. A soft answer not only can turn away wrath, but it can charm the listener. Never be hypercritical of fellow Hygienists who may be but beginners, subject to error. Be gentle in discipline and slow to anger. It is important for Hygienists to pull together, not away from each other. | Remember that a sharp tongue is an asset to no one. A soft answer not only can turn away wrath, but it can charm the listener. Never be hypercritical of fellow Hygienists who may be but beginners, subject to error. Be gentle in discipline and slow to anger. It is important for Hygienists to pull together, not away from each other. | ||
− | We should at all times in our social meetings avoid becoming arrogant and perhaps even rude. We have often observed this among certain individuals at large gatherings of Hygienists, by self-serving interests who are self-satisfied in their expertise about | + | We should at all times in our social meetings avoid becoming arrogant and perhaps even rude. We have often observed this among certain individuals at large gatherings of Hygienists, by self-serving interests who are self-satisfied in their expertise about everything Hygienic. We have observed young people turned completely away from thoughtful consideration of Hygienic principles because a single person cut them off rudely as they asked a simple question. |
This kind of arrogance has no place in Life Science. It can frighten off the more timid ones, the very ones who are perhaps most in need of bur concerned guidance and help. We need to be warm and outgoing, considerate of others and, above all, friendly in our contacts with other people. Who knows? They may know something that we don’t know, some bit of knowledge that may prove to be of great value to us at some future time. | This kind of arrogance has no place in Life Science. It can frighten off the more timid ones, the very ones who are perhaps most in need of bur concerned guidance and help. We need to be warm and outgoing, considerate of others and, above all, friendly in our contacts with other people. Who knows? They may know something that we don’t know, some bit of knowledge that may prove to be of great value to us at some future time. | ||
− | Socializing is a time for fun, for finding and making new friends, for stroking, for learning and for helping one another over the bad times. Only by a cooperative give and take in an atmosphere of sharing can e, as individuals, hope to realize the many | + | Socializing is a time for fun, for finding and making new friends, for stroking, for learning and for helping one another over the bad times. Only by a cooperative give and take in an atmosphere of sharing can e, as individuals, hope to realize the many multiple benefits possible through socializing, with our own kind. Only using socializing for this combined purpose can we hope :o convince others to join with us because we have something so valuable as to merit their attention. |
== Expanding Local Contacts == | == Expanding Local Contacts == | ||
− | Quite often the number of students of Life Science who reside in a particular city is too small for gatherings to warrant the necessary expense of publishing and distributing | + | Quite often the number of students of Life Science who reside in a particular city is too small for gatherings to warrant the necessary expense of publishing and distributing flyer notices or the hours of thought and planning required to host and conduct a public meeting outside of the home. |
− | If confronted by such a situation, it is often possible to enlarge one’s horizons by | + | If confronted by such a situation, it is often possible to enlarge one’s horizons by including other health-oriented groups in your plans; such groups as vegetarians, vegans, members of a nearby health club and similar groups. |
− | It is often interesting to learn just how many “hidden” vegetarians there are who do not belong to any well-known organization or club. At any rate, one should invite all | + | It is often interesting to learn just how many “hidden” vegetarians there are who do not belong to any well-known organization or club. At any rate, one should invite all interested parties to a general meeting for the purpose of hearing a talk on some subject of interest to all who might care to attend. |
− | Various reasons for calling such a group together can also be put forth as, for | + | Various reasons for calling such a group together can also be put forth as, for example, to form a study club on vegetarianism in general; for the purpose of finding out whether or not there are sufficient numbers so inclined who might care to meet on a regular basis for potluck purposes or for dining at a public facility. One can think up various reasons for health-oriented groups to get together for purposes of socializing with likeminded individuals. |
Sometimes these joint meetings can be in the form of a day-long seminar with a number of speakers being featured at two sessions, perhaps two speakers in the morning hours and a single speaker in the afternoon followed by general socializing. | Sometimes these joint meetings can be in the form of a day-long seminar with a number of speakers being featured at two sessions, perhaps two speakers in the morning hours and a single speaker in the afternoon followed by general socializing. | ||
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Occasionally, at meetings of this kind, it may be interesting to divide up into circle mini-groups following the lecture presentation for the purpose of discussion of the topic of the day by those within each assigned circle. All such discussions should be preceded by round-the-circle introductions so that all may become better acquainted. | Occasionally, at meetings of this kind, it may be interesting to divide up into circle mini-groups following the lecture presentation for the purpose of discussion of the topic of the day by those within each assigned circle. All such discussions should be preceded by round-the-circle introductions so that all may become better acquainted. | ||
− | These meetings may become so popular that they can be repeated at frequent | + | These meetings may become so popular that they can be repeated at frequent intervals. On subsequent meetings, circles should be regrouped so that, in time, everyone will become acquainted with those who choose to become regular participants. The same procedure of becoming better acquainted with each other as detailed earlier in this lesson, that off having individuals volunteer information about themselves, can be followed equally well here. |
These circle meetings can prove to be the most interesting and informative way of socializing of all that we have presented. We have seen long-lasting friendships result from these casual meetings. They can prove both creative and supportive. Above all, they offer an opportunity for individuals to participate on an equal footing in groups, small enough to be nonthreatening, even to the most timid. | These circle meetings can prove to be the most interesting and informative way of socializing of all that we have presented. We have seen long-lasting friendships result from these casual meetings. They can prove both creative and supportive. Above all, they offer an opportunity for individuals to participate on an equal footing in groups, small enough to be nonthreatening, even to the most timid. | ||
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Public relations is a phrase in common use these days. For the Hygienic practitioner and the individual Hygienist alike, good public relations can best be established through a continuing and on-going effort to promote satisfying social stroking. | Public relations is a phrase in common use these days. For the Hygienic practitioner and the individual Hygienist alike, good public relations can best be established through a continuing and on-going effort to promote satisfying social stroking. | ||
− | While we should not work just for applause, achievement should always be | + | While we should not work just for applause, achievement should always be rewarded. Becoming a bona fide working Life Scientist is an achievement of which we can all be proud. Let’s advertise our pride in our knowledge of life’s universal laws and our having come to appreciate the fact that there can be one penalty for error: premature death. We are few among many because we are so blessed. |
Let’s encourage getting together for all manner of healthful socializing: for dancing, either aerobic or your style; for calisthenics, eating, hiking or painting; for study and learning; to offer support and to receive it. We all have such a great and wonderful gift to share. There can be no better way to share it than in a spirit of friendly love. The hand of friendship will draw all people closer to life’s joy. | Let’s encourage getting together for all manner of healthful socializing: for dancing, either aerobic or your style; for calisthenics, eating, hiking or painting; for study and learning; to offer support and to receive it. We all have such a great and wonderful gift to share. There can be no better way to share it than in a spirit of friendly love. The hand of friendship will draw all people closer to life’s joy. | ||
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== Article #1: How to Be Socially At Ease == | == Article #1: How to Be Socially At Ease == | ||
− | Let us imagine that you are invited to a lovely party where you will meet strangers as well as people you know. I have decided to make this a tea, as the uncharted casual | + | Let us imagine that you are invited to a lovely party where you will meet strangers as well as people you know. I have decided to make this a tea, as the uncharted casual contacts of a tea party most nearly parallel those of everyday experience. |
PLACE YOURSELF MENTALLY BEFORE YOU GO. Before you go to the party it will be well to study your attitude on your relation to other people generally. Right here your inferiority complex—everybody has one of sorts—begins to stir like a waking beast, doesn’t it? So our first task is to put him to sleep again until we can get rid of him permanently. | PLACE YOURSELF MENTALLY BEFORE YOU GO. Before you go to the party it will be well to study your attitude on your relation to other people generally. Right here your inferiority complex—everybody has one of sorts—begins to stir like a waking beast, doesn’t it? So our first task is to put him to sleep again until we can get rid of him permanently. | ||
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You can’t have a good time at a party or be charming unless you feel on an equal footing with everyone present. Of course, it would be absurd and stupid to compare yourself with your hostess or host and each guest to see if you are an equal. So we must rid ourselves of these surface comparisons. They are unprofitable and odious. | You can’t have a good time at a party or be charming unless you feel on an equal footing with everyone present. Of course, it would be absurd and stupid to compare yourself with your hostess or host and each guest to see if you are an equal. So we must rid ourselves of these surface comparisons. They are unprofitable and odious. | ||
− | If a great singer is present, you can’t honestly feel that your voice is as good as hers. If the richest woman in the community is there, gorgeously gowned, how could you feel that you are as well-dressed as she? Unless you are a striking beauty, you can’t honestly feel that you are as good looking as the prettiest woman there. Unless you have a | + | If a great singer is present, you can’t honestly feel that your voice is as good as hers. If the richest woman in the community is there, gorgeously gowned, how could you feel that you are as well-dressed as she? Unless you are a striking beauty, you can’t honestly feel that you are as good looking as the prettiest woman there. Unless you have a dynamic personality and are a witty conversationalist you can’t even imagine that you are as entertaining as the cleverist woman present. The most popular and beloved woman may be none of these—but she is charming. So why bother with such comparisons? |
− | There is another more important and deeper quality that you can feel which will | + | There is another more important and deeper quality that you can feel which will enable you to mingle easily and enjoy yourself with people above you and below you on the social ladder. It is impossible to keep your social contacts on an even keel. If you lived in a palace and had six secretaries to protect your exclusiveness, you would still meet a number of undesirable people. So you must reach a point in poise and charm where you remain the same regardless of what or whom you contact! |
− | For this type of poise we must have a little philosophy that supports our conviction of equality. There is a danger here that in striving too hard for a sense of equality with the highest types of people one may be a little belligerent and say with a chip on the | + | For this type of poise we must have a little philosophy that supports our conviction of equality. There is a danger here that in striving too hard for a sense of equality with the highest types of people one may be a little belligerent and say with a chip on the shoulder, “I am as good as anybody in the world.” The crudeness and bad taste that would prompt such a statement in that mood are sufficient proof that one is not! |
FEEL A BASIC KINSHIP WITH EVERYONE. We are all travelling the same path. The only difference in people is that each has arrived at a different place on that same path—but we all have the same feelings and the same reactions somewhere along the way. | FEEL A BASIC KINSHIP WITH EVERYONE. We are all travelling the same path. The only difference in people is that each has arrived at a different place on that same path—but we all have the same feelings and the same reactions somewhere along the way. | ||
− | So no matter how shy and small you feel, you may know that everyone present has experienced that same thing. If they have overcome it and seem assured, that should | + | So no matter how shy and small you feel, you may know that everyone present has experienced that same thing. If they have overcome it and seem assured, that should only prove to you that you, also, can conquer your self-consciousness. Try to understand that the other fellow has his problems of inferiority, perhaps not just the same as yours, but, nevertheless, just as real to him. |
− | When you are meeting a new person, try to think of the stranger’s problem of | + | When you are meeting a new person, try to think of the stranger’s problem of instantly adjusting to you—try to help him find familiar ground where he can be at ease. This will accomplish two things. It will take your mind off yourself, eliminating for the moment any possibility of your self-consciousness. (You know you can’t be self-conscious unless you are thinking about yourself!) Then, too, your interest in the newcomer will make him think you are charming. Never be afraid to go more than halfway to establish social ease. Don’t be afraid to walk up to people at a reception or party or tea to say or do something that will make them happier. A wallflower is usually self-elected. She slips through the door and slides into a side seat on the edge of the room as though she were clinging to the edge of a whirling disk and might be thrown off any minute. |
NEVER, TAKE THE FIRST CHAIR IN A ROOM—walk calmly well inside and take the most inviting chair hat is vacant! | NEVER, TAKE THE FIRST CHAIR IN A ROOM—walk calmly well inside and take the most inviting chair hat is vacant! | ||
− | Pause before you enter the room, see where people are, locate your hostess or | + | Pause before you enter the room, see where people are, locate your hostess or whoever is in charge of the affair. Go to her and shake hands. She will introduce you to those landing in her immediate group. |
... “Remember that people put the same interpretation on us that we put on ourselves. They take their cue from is! We cannot control the smoothness of life from without—but we can control it from within—we can control our reactions to anything that happens to us. This is poise! | ... “Remember that people put the same interpretation on us that we put on ourselves. They take their cue from is! We cannot control the smoothness of life from without—but we can control it from within—we can control our reactions to anything that happens to us. This is poise! | ||
− | ... WHEN WE REALIZE THAT THERE IS A STEADFAST, DIVINE | + | ... WHEN WE REALIZE THAT THERE IS A STEADFAST, DIVINE PERSONALITY WITHIN US THAT IS BIGGER AND FINER THAN ANYTHING THAT CAN HAPPEN TO IT, WE HAVE JUST BEGUN TO LIVE. This is when we get up on two feet from the all-“ours of animalism and bewildered ignorance and realize hat we have souls. The experience passes but the experiencer remains to have other experiences. |
− | When you realize the importance of this “experiencer” within you, then you are in a position to develop unshakeable poise. This is not a religious conception—it is an | + | When you realize the importance of this “experiencer” within you, then you are in a position to develop unshakeable poise. This is not a religious conception—it is an inalterable fact of life. The person that you really are is so basically a part of the harmony of the universe—so established in the world of reality—that you can afford to take our importance for granted and put your mind on others. |
− | When you understand this basic truth, you will become socially unselfed and | + | When you understand this basic truth, you will become socially unselfed and immersed in sociability. Just to refrain from talking about yourself, not to be patting your hair and clothes and not to patch your makeup in public—these do not guarantee charm. These are but the first baby steps toward charm in being socially unselfed. Charm demands that you be genuinely interested in your companions—you can’t fake it! |
− | YOU MUST SHOW GENUINE INTEREST. You must be so interested in other | + | YOU MUST SHOW GENUINE INTEREST. You must be so interested in other people that you understand their humanness, stand ready to smile at their arrogance, to fix up their failures, to admire their accomplishments and to ignore their errors. People are fascinating—the most fascinating study in the world! . ... If you can give humanity a mental handclasp of sympathy and at the same time a wink of tolerance, no king nor queen can throw you off poise! |
− | ... The desire to be capable of the best self-expression ... is a splendid motive that drives one to sharpen one’s tools for the making of good conversation—but cold | + | ... The desire to be capable of the best self-expression ... is a splendid motive that drives one to sharpen one’s tools for the making of good conversation—but cold perfection will never warm the hearts of your hearers. You must strike the spark of animating warmth born of a pulsing human urge to share what you feel. |
− | This spark comes from the fires of a burning desire to draw closer to the mind and heart of your neighbor, to give him solace when it is needed, encouragement and | + | This spark comes from the fires of a burning desire to draw closer to the mind and heart of your neighbor, to give him solace when it is needed, encouragement and sympathy always, also laughter to brighten his spirits and to lighten his load. And when I say “neighbor” I do not merely mean that person whom you would like to cultivate for social or material reasons. I refer to every life that touches yours. |
'''From The Woman You Want to Be by Margery Wilson. Published by J. B. Lippincott Co., Philadelphia and New York. Copyright 1938.''' | '''From The Woman You Want to Be by Margery Wilson. Published by J. B. Lippincott Co., Philadelphia and New York. Copyright 1938.''' | ||
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It is remarkable what a varied combination of houses make up a community, yet they are all made of the same basic materials. However, keeping that observation in mind, take a second look at those houses, and you will realize that there is another factor that is causing your varied reactions. | It is remarkable what a varied combination of houses make up a community, yet they are all made of the same basic materials. However, keeping that observation in mind, take a second look at those houses, and you will realize that there is another factor that is causing your varied reactions. | ||
− | It is the amount of love and caring found in the homes, or not found in them, that is evident the moment you step inside. It doesn’t matter if the house is impeccably clean or has that “lived-in” look. These are only outward appearances, and provide no real | + | It is the amount of love and caring found in the homes, or not found in them, that is evident the moment you step inside. It doesn’t matter if the house is impeccably clean or has that “lived-in” look. These are only outward appearances, and provide no real measure of the family that resides there. We can feel at once whether the house vibrates and radiates love or emptiness. |
== Article #3: An Excerpt from In Tune With the Infinite by Ralph Waldo Trine == | == Article #3: An Excerpt from In Tune With the Infinite by Ralph Waldo Trine == | ||
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When we come to fully realize the great fact that all evil and error and sin with all their consequent sufferings come through ignorance, then wherever we see a manifestation of these in whatever form, if our hearts are right, we will have compassion and sympathy for the one in whom we see them. | When we come to fully realize the great fact that all evil and error and sin with all their consequent sufferings come through ignorance, then wherever we see a manifestation of these in whatever form, if our hearts are right, we will have compassion and sympathy for the one in whom we see them. | ||
− | Compassion will then change itself into love, and love will manifest itself in kindly service. Such is the divine method. And so instead of aiding in trampling and keeping a weaker one down, we will hold him up until he can stand alone and become the master. But all life growth is from within out, and one becomes a true master in the degree that the knowledge of the divinity of one’s own nature dawns upon one’s inner consciousness and so brings one to a knowledge of the higher laws; and in no way can we so | + | Compassion will then change itself into love, and love will manifest itself in kindly service. Such is the divine method. And so instead of aiding in trampling and keeping a weaker one down, we will hold him up until he can stand alone and become the master. But all life growth is from within out, and one becomes a true master in the degree that the knowledge of the divinity of one’s own nature dawns upon one’s inner consciousness and so brings one to a knowledge of the higher laws; and in no way can we so effectually hasten this dawning in the inner consciousness of another, as by showing forth the divinity within ourselves simply by the way we live. |
− | By example and not by precept. By living, not by preaching. By doing, not by | + | By example and not by precept. By living, not by preaching. By doing, not by professing. By living the life, not by dogmatizing as to how it should be lived. There is no contagion equal to the contagion of life. Whatever we sow, that shall we also reap, and each thing sown produces of its kind. We can kill not only by doing another bodily injury directly, but we can and we do kill by every antagonistic thought. Not only do we thus kill, but while we kill we commit suicide. Many a man has been made sick by having the ill thoughts of a number of people centered on him; some have been actually killed. Put hatred into the world and we make it a literal hell. Put love into the world and heaven with all its beauties and glories becomes a reality. |
− | Not to live is not to live, or it is to live a living death. The life that goes out in love to all is the life that is full and rich, and continually expanding in beauty and in power. Such is the life that becomes ever more inclusive, and hence larger in its scope and influence. The larger the man and the woman, the more inclusive they are in their love and their friendships. The smaller the man and the woman, the more dwarfed and dwindling their natures, the more they pride themselves on their “exclusiveness.” Anyone—a fool or an idiot—can be exclusive. It comes easy. It takes and it signifies a large nature to be | + | Not to live is not to live, or it is to live a living death. The life that goes out in love to all is the life that is full and rich, and continually expanding in beauty and in power. Such is the life that becomes ever more inclusive, and hence larger in its scope and influence. The larger the man and the woman, the more inclusive they are in their love and their friendships. The smaller the man and the woman, the more dwarfed and dwindling their natures, the more they pride themselves on their “exclusiveness.” Anyone—a fool or an idiot—can be exclusive. It comes easy. It takes and it signifies a large nature to be universal, to be inclusive. Only the man or the woman of a small, personal, self-centered, self-seeking nature is exclusive. The man or the woman of a large, royal, unself-centered nature never is. The small nature is the one that continually strives for effect. The larger nature never does. The one goes here and there in order to gain recognition, in order to attach himself to the world. The other stays at home and draws the world to him. The one loves merely himself. The other loves all the world; but in his larger love for all the world he finds himself included. |
Verily, then, the more one loves, the nearer he approaches to God, for God is the spirit of infinite love. And when we come into the realization of our oneness with this Infinite Spirit, then divine love so fills us that, enriching and enrapturing our own lives, from them it flows out to enrich the life of all the world. | Verily, then, the more one loves, the nearer he approaches to God, for God is the spirit of infinite love. And when we come into the realization of our oneness with this Infinite Spirit, then divine love so fills us that, enriching and enrapturing our own lives, from them it flows out to enrich the life of all the world. | ||
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In coming, into the realization of our oneness with the Infinite Life, we are brought at once into right relations with our fellow men. We are brought into harmony with the | In coming, into the realization of our oneness with the Infinite Life, we are brought at once into right relations with our fellow men. We are brought into harmony with the | ||
− | great law, that we find our own lives in losing them in the services of others. We are brought to a knowledge of the fact that all life is one, and so that we are all parts of the one great whole. We then realize that we can’t do for another without at the same time doing for ourselves. We also realize that we cannot do harm to another without by that very act doing harm to ourselves. We realize that the man who lives to himself alone lives a little, dwarfed and stunted life, because he has no part in this larger life of | + | great law, that we find our own lives in losing them in the services of others. We are brought to a knowledge of the fact that all life is one, and so that we are all parts of the one great whole. We then realize that we can’t do for another without at the same time doing for ourselves. We also realize that we cannot do harm to another without by that very act doing harm to ourselves. We realize that the man who lives to himself alone lives a little, dwarfed and stunted life, because he has no part in this larger life of humanity. But the man who in service loses his own life in this larger life, has his own life increased and enriched a thousand or a millionfold, and every joy, every happiness, everything of value coming to each member of this greater whole comes as such to him, for he has a part in the life of each and all. |
− | And here let a word be said in regard to true service. Peter and John were going up to the temple one day, and as they were entering the gate they were met by a poor cripple who asked them for alms. Instead of giving him something to supply the day’s needs and then leaving him in the same dependent condition for the morrow and the morrow, | + | And here let a word be said in regard to true service. Peter and John were going up to the temple one day, and as they were entering the gate they were met by a poor cripple who asked them for alms. Instead of giving him something to supply the day’s needs and then leaving him in the same dependent condition for the morrow and the morrow, Peter did him a real service, and a real service for all mankind by saying, “Silver and gold have I none, but such as I have I give unto thee.” And then he made him whole. He thus brought him into the condition where he could help himself. In other words, the greatest service we can do for another is to help him to help himself. To help him directly might be weakening, though not necessarily. It depends entirely on circumstances. But to help a person to help himself is never weakening, but always encouraging and strengthening, because it leads him to a larger and stronger life. |
− | There is no better way to help another to help himself than to bring him to a | + | There is no better way to help another to help himself than to bring him to a knowledge of himself. There is no better way to bring him to a knowledge of himself than to lead him to a knowledge of the powers that are lying dormant within his own soul. There is nothing that will enable him to come more readily or more completely into an awakened knowledge of the powers that are lying dormant within his own soul, than to bring him into the conscious, vital realization of his oneness with the Infinite Life and Power, so that he may open himself to it in order that it may work and manifest through him. |
− | Originally printed and copyrighted in 1908. Bobbs-Merrill Co., Inc. NY. Last | + | Originally printed and copyrighted in 1908. Bobbs-Merrill Co., Inc. NY. Last copyright 1970. |
== Article #4: Preparing A Dinner Party For Non-Hygienic Guests by Elizabeth D. McCarter, D.Sc. == | == Article #4: Preparing A Dinner Party For Non-Hygienic Guests by Elizabeth D. McCarter, D.Sc. == | ||
− | So! You’ve decided to take that big step: to host a gala dinner party for some of your nonHygienic friends. It can be done, you know, and without compromising your | + | So! You’ve decided to take that big step: to host a gala dinner party for some of your nonHygienic friends. It can be done, you know, and without compromising your principles, too! And certainly without all the hours and days of preparation required when hosting a more conventional dinner featuring the usual gourmet type of heterogeneous combinations. |
Plan first of all to set a gala dinner table. Get out all your best silverware and fine china. Polish up the candlesticks and plan to dine by candle light. Check your linens and, if need be, see that they are all freshly laundered, ready for the big day. All this routine work can be done days ahead of time. | Plan first of all to set a gala dinner table. Get out all your best silverware and fine china. Polish up the candlesticks and plan to dine by candle light. Check your linens and, if need be, see that they are all freshly laundered, ready for the big day. All this routine work can be done days ahead of time. | ||
− | Plan a centerpiece, of course. This can consist of flowers from your own yard or from the florist. In the fall or wintertime, lovely centerpieces can be made from a wide variety of gourds, pine cones, apples, or whatever. Women’s magazines are filled with all kinds of ideas so go to the library and check a few of them to find an idea most | + | Plan a centerpiece, of course. This can consist of flowers from your own yard or from the florist. In the fall or wintertime, lovely centerpieces can be made from a wide variety of gourds, pine cones, apples, or whatever. Women’s magazines are filled with all kinds of ideas so go to the library and check a few of them to find an idea most appropriate to your circumstances. |
Next, plan your menu. You will be a guest at this party, too, so plan your party with that in mind. Market a day or two before the big event and stock the refrigerator and ripening bowls with various kinds of fruit in season. | Next, plan your menu. You will be a guest at this party, too, so plan your party with that in mind. Market a day or two before the big event and stock the refrigerator and ripening bowls with various kinds of fruit in season. | ||
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Purchase baking potatoes of good quality, several varieties of low starch and green vegetables, two or three kinds of lettuce, some sprouts (or better yet, grow your own) and two or three different kinds of nuts. Pecans are popular as are almonds and cashews, all unsalted and un-toasted. You might plan to have a casserole dish of some kind or even some lightly steamed ears of corn. Be sure to allow plenty of time for bananas and other fruits to ripen as well as the tomatoes and avocados. | Purchase baking potatoes of good quality, several varieties of low starch and green vegetables, two or three kinds of lettuce, some sprouts (or better yet, grow your own) and two or three different kinds of nuts. Pecans are popular as are almonds and cashews, all unsalted and un-toasted. You might plan to have a casserole dish of some kind or even some lightly steamed ears of corn. Be sure to allow plenty of time for bananas and other fruits to ripen as well as the tomatoes and avocados. | ||
− | The night before your party set your table. If you need some ideas on how properly to set a table, your local librarian can refer you to suitable books to obtain this | + | The night before your party set your table. If you need some ideas on how properly to set a table, your local librarian can refer you to suitable books to obtain this information. Make it pretty and inviting. Set out the serving trays, dishes and appropriate ladles, tongs and so on. |
− | The morning of your party make your food preparation. Wash and dry the lettuces. Carefully wrap the washed pieces in towels and put in the refrigerator. Scrub your fruits and rinse with pure water. I use a liquid soap that make using Ivory flakes for this | + | The morning of your party make your food preparation. Wash and dry the lettuces. Carefully wrap the washed pieces in towels and put in the refrigerator. Scrub your fruits and rinse with pure water. I use a liquid soap that make using Ivory flakes for this purpose. Proceed the same with all the vegetables except, of course, the ears of corn. These should remain intact until dinnertime. All the vegetables can then be returned to the refrigerator. |
I usually set up a buffet table, the longer the better, especially if you are hosting a fairly large party of fifteen or more guests. For smaller groups, a smaller buffet, perhaps comprising two cardtables set side by side and covered with a single table cloth would be sufficient. | I usually set up a buffet table, the longer the better, especially if you are hosting a fairly large party of fifteen or more guests. For smaller groups, a smaller buffet, perhaps comprising two cardtables set side by side and covered with a single table cloth would be sufficient. | ||
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You will want to have plenty of food available so that your guests will have a variety from which to choose. | You will want to have plenty of food available so that your guests will have a variety from which to choose. | ||
− | Make several attractive fruit arrangements, each plate featuring compatible | + | Make several attractive fruit arrangements, each plate featuring compatible combinations of fruits. For example, you might place on one large round serving tray: an attractive assortment of strawberries, pineapple slices, kiwi fruit and oranges, all placed on a well arranged bed of Bibb (limestone) lettuce. |
− | On another dish arrange pieces of Romaine in a circle configuration and place a huge mound of assorted grapes on it, perhaps surrounded by schoolboy size red | + | On another dish arrange pieces of Romaine in a circle configuration and place a huge mound of assorted grapes on it, perhaps surrounded by schoolboy size red Deliciousbrand apples or, in season, ripe apricots and nectarines or slices of papaya. On a third dish use dark leafy green lettuce and use it as a background for delectable dried fruits: varieties of dates, dried figs, little paper cups of raisins with, perhaps, a star arrangement of bananas to separate the different kinds of dried fruits. |
− | Always try to use the fruits which are readily available in your area. Persimmons in October and November often provide a wonderful treat as do the Bing cherries and | + | Always try to use the fruits which are readily available in your area. Persimmons in October and November often provide a wonderful treat as do the Bing cherries and apricots which are plentiful in the latter part of June. Some of your guests may have never eaten mangos or New Zealand kiwi fruit. And, believe it or not, many may never have enjoyed the rich succulence of a Medjool date! All exotic fruits provide interesting conversation pieces. Place all the fruit dishes at one end of the table. |
− | Next come the salad vegetables. Get the largest bowl you can find or dig out one of those huge long-unused (we hope), but gleaming, pots that you may have used at one time for cooking. Fill it with a variety of lettuces which you have broken up into pieces. Add tiny slivers of carrots, red and green cabbage, chunks of green and red peppers, broccoli flowers, and strips of cucumber. (I always use the unwaxed pickling | + | Next come the salad vegetables. Get the largest bowl you can find or dig out one of those huge long-unused (we hope), but gleaming, pots that you may have used at one time for cooking. Fill it with a variety of lettuces which you have broken up into pieces. Add tiny slivers of carrots, red and green cabbage, chunks of green and red peppers, broccoli flowers, and strips of cucumber. (I always use the unwaxed pickling cucumbers). Place stalks of celery in a pitcher of your choice and place it near the salad bowl (or pot). |
− | Or, let your guests make their own salads. This is always a good opportunity for questions and answers, too, although now we find more and more people are becoming salad-oriented. If individual salad-making is your “thing,” then place the salad | + | Or, let your guests make their own salads. This is always a good opportunity for questions and answers, too, although now we find more and more people are becoming salad-oriented. If individual salad-making is your “thing,” then place the salad vegetables in individual dishes and arrange them colorfully around a large lettuce bowl. Let your guests help themselves. |
Make a salad dressing of lemon juice and olive oil sparked with a dash of walnut oil for flavor interest. Or, make one of cucumbers, celery plus a little avocado—all of which are blended together with a little green onion. Put each dressing in an attractive decanter or in a small serving bowl with a ladle or large dipping spoon. Be sure to put out a salt-free seasoning mixture. Vegebase is an acceptable mixture. | Make a salad dressing of lemon juice and olive oil sparked with a dash of walnut oil for flavor interest. Or, make one of cucumbers, celery plus a little avocado—all of which are blended together with a little green onion. Put each dressing in an attractive decanter or in a small serving bowl with a ladle or large dipping spoon. Be sure to put out a salt-free seasoning mixture. Vegebase is an acceptable mixture. | ||
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It is nice always to have quartered or sliced tomatoes and avocado strips on a side dish with either of the salad buffets so that guests who enjoy these fruit-vegetables may add them to their other choices. | It is nice always to have quartered or sliced tomatoes and avocado strips on a side dish with either of the salad buffets so that guests who enjoy these fruit-vegetables may add them to their other choices. | ||
− | If your choice or choices of main dish (dishes) has been baked potatoes or a | + | If your choice or choices of main dish (dishes) has been baked potatoes or a casserole, or both, these should be timed for the proper cooking time and the oven lighted about 15 minutes before. The potatoes and casserole should be timed as exactly as possible so that they will be ready for your guests when needed. While neither the potatoes nor casserole will be strictly Hygienic, nevertheless some cooked dishes can often provide for your guests a most enjoyable finale to a very enjoyable repast. |
− | There are numerous vegetarian casseroles that will delight the taste. Baked potatoes served with an avocado blend made from avocado, a little distilled water and some | + | There are numerous vegetarian casseroles that will delight the taste. Baked potatoes served with an avocado blend made from avocado, a little distilled water and some vegebase often prove to be a delightful treat. Why not bake your potatoes early in the day, scoop out the contents, mix with the avocado mixture, stuff, wrap in foil and keep in the refrigerator until your guests are ready to go to the table. At that time place the unwrapped stuffed potatoes in the preheated oven. They’ll be heated and ready for your guests at the appropriate time. |
− | If an eggplant tomato casserole is your choice, put it out on the serving table, | + | If an eggplant tomato casserole is your choice, put it out on the serving table, surround it with an assortment of natural, undyed soft and hard cheeses plus a dish of sliced tomatos and an assortment of nuts. Separate the nuts from the cheeses by using the tomato dish. (The nuts could also be placed with the salad but we find it usually better to place them with an appropriate casserole.) |
If fresh steamed corn or other steamed vegetables are to be served, they should, of course, be put out on the buffet along with other suggested main dishes. Steamed corn is always welcome. Most of your guests will want butter with their corn. Buy a quarter pound or so of raw unsalted butter if you can find it in your area. Place it by the steamed corn. | If fresh steamed corn or other steamed vegetables are to be served, they should, of course, be put out on the buffet along with other suggested main dishes. Steamed corn is always welcome. Most of your guests will want butter with their corn. Buy a quarter pound or so of raw unsalted butter if you can find it in your area. Place it by the steamed corn. | ||
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We serve baked corn gems in place of bread. I can make these several days before the party and keep them in the refrigerator. To make these, I purchase freshly ground corn and wheat at a local health food store plus some ground unsweetened dried coconut (or I grind my own). To four cups of corn meal I add 1 cup of coconut and 1 cup of ground wheat. After a thorough mixing I add boiling water to make a dough-like consistency. I roll out the dough in a 4 inch wide strip and cut into two-inch “gems.” I put the gems on baking sheets which have been left to heat in an oven at 400°F. I bake these for about 15 minutes, then turn them over. I then turn off the oven and let the gems cook until the right consistency, about 10 more minutes. | We serve baked corn gems in place of bread. I can make these several days before the party and keep them in the refrigerator. To make these, I purchase freshly ground corn and wheat at a local health food store plus some ground unsweetened dried coconut (or I grind my own). To four cups of corn meal I add 1 cup of coconut and 1 cup of ground wheat. After a thorough mixing I add boiling water to make a dough-like consistency. I roll out the dough in a 4 inch wide strip and cut into two-inch “gems.” I put the gems on baking sheets which have been left to heat in an oven at 400°F. I bake these for about 15 minutes, then turn them over. I then turn off the oven and let the gems cook until the right consistency, about 10 more minutes. | ||
− | Since the gems are cold when I take them out .of the refrigerator, I sprinkle them with a few drops of distilled water and remove them to the oven for 10 minutes or so | + | Since the gems are cold when I take them out .of the refrigerator, I sprinkle them with a few drops of distilled water and remove them to the oven for 10 minutes or so before placing them on the buffet table. They are great when eaten with a salad of greens! |
− | For dessert, I usually prepare a frozen fruit delight which I make by pureeing a dried fruit (dates, apricots and apples are a good choice) with a little distilled water and then mixing it with banana “ice cream.” This mixture can, then be placed in champagne | + | For dessert, I usually prepare a frozen fruit delight which I make by pureeing a dried fruit (dates, apricots and apples are a good choice) with a little distilled water and then mixing it with banana “ice cream.” This mixture can, then be placed in champagne glasses or in any kind of fancy glassy covered with plastic wrap, and then put in the freezer until dinner time. When your guests are seated at the table enjoying your stuffed potatoes or steamed corn or your tasty casserole, you can quietly set this wonderful desert out on the buffet. |
− | Good friends, fine food, soothing music, fun, laughter and lively! conversation are boon to the soul. While many errors in eating will no doubt be made by your guests from time to time, nevertheless, they will welcome this kind of friendly introduction to natural foods for good eating. We need this kind of friendly rapport from time to time. There are many serving suggestions, ideas galore, to be found in various books written by hygienists and by almost-hygienists. Hannah Allen’s Homemaker’s Guide is a good one. Of course, we like our own, The Exciting World of Healthful Cookery! and | + | Good friends, fine food, soothing music, fun, laughter and lively! conversation are boon to the soul. While many errors in eating will no doubt be made by your guests from time to time, nevertheless, they will welcome this kind of friendly introduction to natural foods for good eating. We need this kind of friendly rapport from time to time. There are many serving suggestions, ideas galore, to be found in various books written by hygienists and by almost-hygienists. Hannah Allen’s Homemaker’s Guide is a good one. Of course, we like our own, The Exciting World of Healthful Cookery! and Healthful Living always has some great ideas by Marti Fry. So, don’t think you have to live to yourself. You really don’t! Try some of our ideas and put a little fun into your life. Learn how to socialize Hygienically and even almost-hygienically once in a while. Watch your spirits soar! |
Revision as of 17:19, 3 June 2021
Lesson 81 - Socializing And Natural Hygiene
Introduction
Natural Hygienists, for the most part, are well aware of the truism that the mere fact that they are Hygienists causes them to live in foreign territory, captives within an environment that is polluted and mechanized beyond all rational reasoning, an environment that is an affront to unperverted senses and capable of almost unlimited assault on our physical being; and, most of all, captives of a social, economic and medical hierarchy which is capable of showing little or no mercy to those individuals who do not fully subscribe to its tenets.
We know that we are beset on all sides by a barrage of sights, sounds and messages that are contrary to all organic reality and that we reside in the midst of a people apparently gone mad; people who, almost without exception, overeat on foods biologically and physiologically unfit for humans to eat, foods the virtues of which are extolled by powerful economic forces. There are people who are sexually and morally perverted. Unwillingly we find ourselves non-participants within a society which is mentally, morally and spiritually decadent. We stand on the sidelines, so to speak, yet we are part of social and economic order which is not in the best interest of the people who, willingly or unwillingly, participate in it. People have come to seek after things and not ideals. They seem to know nothing of the values of life and lacking this knowledge, they have become manipulated puppets, apparently with little desire to learn or change.
Consequently, we Hygienists have had to choose. We have made a carefully thought out choice to live as more-or-less isolated individuals living in society but nevertheless determined to survive in the very midst of multitudinous carefully controlled and orchestrated assaults of one kind or another on our mental, moral and physical well-being.
If we are to survive under present conditions and circumstances, it is essential for us to have support from others of like mind, else we are likely to be felled prematurely as we attempt to wend our solitary way through life’s maze.
Psychologists call this kind of supporting “stroking.” Stroking refers to the giving to another person the assurance that he is loved, that he is important to another person who really cares about him as an individual, this in spite of all possible foolishness and/or weakness on his part. All that the stroked one is called upon to do is to give evidence of a willingness to learn, to grow because, in time, he hopes himself to become capable of stroking others.
Hygienists have varying degrees of expertise in the principles put forth by Life Science, some more, others less, hygienists, for the most part, are thinkers, idealists, often
in the upper ten percent of the population intellectually. All seek the higher road through knowledge. However, knowledge alone is rarely sufficient. We need the doing and to help us in this phase of our individual development, we often require the assistance of others; stroking, if you will. Socializing can provide such needed support.
Few among us comprehend the powers of the mind. A positive mind steeped in knowledge and fortified by conviction can often help a sick person to be restored to a far higher plateau of health so quickly as to confound the skeptics.
Let us give an example of what we mean. Jerry has a rare muscular disease. For three years he has been a student of Natural Hygiene. In these three years he has seen many of his former incapacitating symptoms either leave entirely or be remarkably reduced. Recently he had occasion to visit his former medical advisor. He had enthusiastically prepared himself to tell him all about his progress and how he had been able to bring about such remarkable improvement. However, his erstwhile respected advisor exclaimed, “Jerry, you are not ‘cured.’ You are just in remission. Don’t be fooled. Your symptoms will all come back. Just wait. You’ll see!”
This is an example of stroking in reverse, negativity. A sick mind, lacking both sufficient knowledge and perhaps conviction through lack of support and even because of negative strokes, can tarry overly long in the wall of depression, so burdened by toxic debris that he will fail to make any meaningful progress.
Socializing has a proper role to play in all healing. The right kind of socializing can help to restore and reinforce important mental values. If we have knowledge, conviction and determination and, in addition, the support of caring from like-minded people, our forward progress cannot help but be accelerated. Socializing with other Hygienists can provide this kind of caring support.
On Being Sociable
Alexander the Great accomplished many things in his lifetime and on many occasions he had cause to celebrate. And so he did! Alexander was a master host.
Following his victory over Darius and his Persian army, Alexander the Great hosted a party to end all parties, a mass wedding feast. On this occasion, hundreds of his warriors took wives, even though most of them already had wives and family at home. Alexander did, too!
At this extravaganza there were thousands of gaudily attired dancers. Musicians strolled about serenading the guests. Flowers were everywhere and scores of servers brought in meats, wines, fruits and an endless array of delectibles to charm and delight the senses and tantalize the palate. Laughter, gaiety, happiness and joy prevailed. The partakers gorged until the morning dawn found all having surcease in deep sleep.
We Hygienists, of course, don’t condone such indulgence and gourmandizing but we also have cause to celebrate. We also have occasion for rejoicing even though presently we may not be in the best of health and even though we may be but novitiates and have barely made a beginning on the road to better health. We have cause to rejoice, to celebrate because we have found TRUTH. We know that we, at long last, possess knowledge of the only possible way to regain health if it has been lost, provided of course that sufficient vital force is yet resident within the body not only to instigate the healing process but also to energize it until the desired level of health is finally reached.
We rejoice also in the full realization that once we reach our ultimate goal of complete freedom from pain and full enjoyment of that euphoric state that only full health can bring (and we know that we will), that we now either possess knowledge of how to
maintain our existing high level of health or we are aware of the essence of truth and are resolved to expand our knowledge of Hygienic principles so that we can attain our own individual goal(s), whatever they may be. We know that we possess great cause for rejoicing and celebrating because we are few among many. We are the lucky ones. The masses remain needlessly enmeshed in the throes of suffering and disease. Only we have escaped!
We fully realize that there are numerous and deep chasms of the unknown when it comes to full knowledge of the human body but we also are aware that the fundamental truths of life have been established by centuries of correct living on the part of a few and that Hygienists of the past have set these forth for our acceptance and practice in the 19 requisites of organic existence, these having been learned in this course: fresh air, pure water, and all the others so important to our well-being.
Socializing, friendships—these are among the psychological plus factors of life. They are important to health. We have already noted that man is, by nature, a gregarious creature. We need to be part of a group, to be recognized, to be made to feel that we as individuals count, that each one of us is important.
A great healer knows that there are many things the average adult wants and yearns for and leading the list, before money and all the things money will buy, is health and the preservation of life. Socializing with other Natural Hygienists will not only expand our knowledge of Hygienic truths but will also underscore our conviction as to the rightness of our present course; or, if we err, it will serve as a medium to correct us.
Why This Lesson?
Learning how to contact other Hygienists for the purposes of socializing, having fun, expanding knowledge, underscoring our personal convictions and giving mutual support to one another is, we believe, a legitimate part of this course. We have made it a part of our own practice and policy and have observed socializing in action. The rewards are endless.
The information contained in this lesson should help new Hygienists who may now feel set apart to find their own niche in life. It should show them how they can become a “best friend” to another or to many others.
Beginning practitioners should find in this lesson some ideas to correlate in their practice, ideas which will provide an outlet not only for their individual talents but also a release for their private cares and concerns. Socializing in a meaningful way can help to expand one’s practice.
We should all remember that it is not wholesome to stay to one’s self. We only reach the height of our own powers when we begin to reach out toward others. We have a real inner need to serve other people, to include them in our activities; and to be included in theirs.
We cannot, of course, cover in this lesson all methods of socializing possible or acceptable to Hygienists but, hopefully, we will offer a sufficient number of suggestions to enable practitioners and individual students alike to expand their contacts for the purposes herein set forth.
Start Where You Are
Common sense should guide us in our choices of where we shall go, what we shall do and with whom we shall socialize. Early in this discussion we pointed out that Hygienists have, by choice, removed themselves from the masses. However, this does not mean that we cannot make casual entrances into society at large. What it does say is that our strolls therein should be carefully chosen and formulated to fulfill a primary need.
For example, we personally go to church regularly. We attend both teaching classes and regular services. Generally speaking, the people we meet are individuals with whom
we feel comfortable and from our contacts there we find a certain number with whom we can exchange thoughts and ideas in a social situation to our mutual benefit without feeling that we are being manipulated or reduced in any way.
One of our students enjoys painting in oils. She is a Hygienist. She could have chosen to paint in her own studio or she might have set her lonely easel out on the floor of the desert and endlessly painted the beautiful mountains that surround the city of Tucson. These mountains always intrigue artists—their colors and configurations change as the sun moves across the sky from east to west.
Instead our student chose otherwise, at least for part of the time. She went to the Chamber of Commerce and learned where painting classes were being held and made her choice among the many beings offered: some by the city Parks and Recreation Department, others by churches; there were classes at local schools and colleges. She found many from which to choose.
Do you have a hobby? Undoubtedly similar classes having to do with your very own special interest can be found where you live or within a reasonable distance. Inquire around and find your niche.
Our Student Hosts a Party
Some time later, after she had become better acquainted with her classmates, our student invited them all to join her for a fruit breakfast, this to be followed by a painting session in the desert overlooking the celebrated Pusch Ridge.
What did the party cost her? Nothing except the effort of extending the invitation. The whole class eagerly responded (everybody likes a party!) and, since this was to be a potluck occasion, they all brought their own food and their own service. And, what is more, a fruit breakfast was a new experience which every single one found most enjoyable—a delightful change from the usual ham and eggs!
This same idea can be incorporated when one’s interests lie in other directions. In every town and city these days there are clubs and group meetings, free lectures and seminars, classes to satisfy a wide range of interests. The Hygienist who feels set apart or lonely must learn to reach out toward that area of society in which s/he can feel comfortable.
Once you have become a part of the group, you must learn to reach out toward others. For some this reaching out to include others may be a new experience but, remember our admonition: it is not wholesome to remain to ourselves too much.
Practice will expand our talents in reaching out. Margery Wilson, the charm lady, said it well, “When the mind dwells too deeply and too long on the self, it shrivels those tendrils of the heart that reach out from the warm and inclusive human being.” So strive to keep your own hospitality light bright and shining. Don’t forget that you will begin to glow with an inner glow as you improve in health, so much so that your newly-found friends will soon begin to ask you questions. How rewarding that time will be. Then you will be given a golden opportunity to give to another human being the gift of life itself.
Parties Do Not Have to be Large
Two stories will serve to illustrate the point that parties do not have to be large to be happy occasions. They also demonstrate how easy it can be to make new friends when we are willing to make the first friendly gesture. We have told these stories elsewhere in other writings, but they deserve repeating here to emphasize the point that even small gatherings, indeed socializing with a single other person, can be rewarding.
One time we were aimlessly strolling around the streets of Rome in search of one of that city’s famous fountains, since our knowledge of Italian is very limited, we had difficulty in communicating our needs to the passerby. So, there we were, lost in a foreign
city, strangers among a people with whom we could not speak. What a hopeless feeling that can impart!
Suddenly, Dr. Elizabeth spied a tall, well-dressed gentleman standing on a nearby corner. Never bashful, she went up to him and, in her broken Italian asked for directions. The gentleman doffed his hat, bowed gracefully and replied, “Madam, if you will but speak to me the American, so that I may practice the speaking of it, I will be honored to show you my Roma!”
And so he did. We spent a wonderful afternoon with our host. He showed us his Roma as few tourists have been privileged to see it. And, as the dusk was falling, he invited us to share refreshments with him at a little sidewalk cafe. Finally, to his obvious regret and ours, he bowed and, taking his leave, presented us with his card. To our astonishment, we found that we had spent this wonderful afternoon with a Count, a celebrated member of the Italian government.
On another occasion we were in Maxime’s in Paris, that world-famous restaurant. We had been seated at a wall table overlooking the entire main room. Our eyes were wide with wonder as we watched “High Fashion” at lunch. A black gentleman was seated next to us at the adjacent table. Suddenly, he leaned over to Dr. Elizabeth and aid, “I beg Madame’s pardon, but are you Americans?” Upon learning that indeed we were, we were asked to be his guests. For well over two hours we received attention galore.
Our host proved to be witty, charming and a delightful conversationalist, a graduate of one of America’s most elite universities. We had a wonderful time. Finally, our host said that he had to go to Geneva and, regretfully, must take his leave.
He, too, left behind his personal card. Only then did we learn that our friend was an official representative of an African country to the United Nations. He was a very important gentleman, indeed. And yet, he took time out to be kind to two strangers who, like him, were having luncheon alone in a foreign land. Why? Because Elizabeth had smiled at him as she was being seated!
How to Have a Hygienic Party
Let us first address the problem of the individual Hygienist, male or female, who knows no other Hygienists in the immediate community where s/he resides. However, he usually does have a circle of acquaintances that he has acquired from time to time during the years he has lived in the community or from among the population who live in the general geographical location.
The same format as detailed above for the painting class party can be used. Host a fruit breakfast, or a “brunch,” or have a salad luncheon.
The Hygienist host or hostess may either supply the food and service for his guests or stipulate, “Let’s have a pot-luck.” You may decide on a salad potluck or a fruit potluck; or even make it a “bring your favorite dish” pot-luck; or just get together for an evening of fun.
If no food is to be served, you will, of course, have to provide a means of entertainment. Games of various kinds may be provided, tapes may be played (there are fun tapes to be had for just such occasions. These are tapes designed to make even the grouchiest listener smile once in awhile.)
Invitations may be given orally, by telephone or in person, or they may be mailed on bright party-looking fun cards. They can be formal as for a sit-down luncheon or casual for a buffet-type gathering.
Potlucks are especially interesting and they are easy on the person hosting the party. You need not be an Alexander the Great. We, of course, do not condone the gluttony and indulgence displayed by Alexander and his soldiers, but what we do wish to emphasize by that example and through this lesson is the fact that we all have a need to socialize. His party was a skillful way on his part of rewarding his soldiers for their excellent work. In the same way by having an occasional party we can reward ourselves for our good
work and also give to other Hygienists an opportunity to share fun and friendship with others and thus in the doing enlarge our own happiness and our own social awareness and participation.
The “bring your favorite dish” potluck is always fun. Guests enjoy seeing and experimenting with the dishes brought by all the other guests.
Words to Ponder
Parties can be as expensive as your wish, or as inexpensive. The main ingredient of a happy party is hospitality, the offering of a friendly smile and the extending of a friendly hand in greeting. All people have a genuine need to be loved, to feel that they are important to someone.
Remember FDR? Franklin Delano Roosevelt, the thirty-second president of the United States, was a master host even upon small occasions having no particular significance either to him personally or to the country at large. One time a new car was presented to him as a gift by one of the large car makers, the car to be used on state occasions.
A chauffeur drove the car to the front of the White House and FDR with his entourage came down the steps for the formal presentation. There were many invited guests there for the occasion. FDR took it upon himself to learn the name of the man who drove the car to the White House and made it a point to thank the man not only personally but publicly. And, he did even more, for a few days later, the chauffeur, who was obviously politically unimportant to the president, received a surprise in the mail: an autographed picture and a personal note of thanks signed by the president of the United States!
One time we were to act as host and hostess at a party for a well-known soprano. She is internationally famous and has sung before presidents and kings, frequently at our own White House. The party was given by an “important” musical group. Was it a formal black tie affair? No, indeed! Just the opposite, as a matter of fact. So informal was it that no utensils were served and there were no chairs on which to sit. Our famous soprano and we sat on some boxes and delved into meringues and Hors D’Oeuvres with our fingers. After the party was over, she remarked that she couldn’t recall when she had had such fun!
We can learn from these two examples. People are important, not the trappings of the party. Make your guests feel welcome and wanted and your party will be a success.
Some Party Ideas
If you are fortunate enough to have a pool at your home, your party plans are half made. Have a swimming party. If not, why not invite your new friends to meet you at a specified day and hour for a picnic at a public pool? Most communities have one.
On these occasions your guests provide their own food. Or, again, the potluck approach can be used. The main thing you will be required to do will be to arrange with the proper authorities ahead of time so that you and your guests will be expected and a table set aside in an appropriate spot for your exclusive use. You should, of course, know just how many people to expect and have seating for all.
Occasionally, we host a “hiking breakfast.” Our students or friends gather here at the ranch at an early hour and off we go on a specified route which covers anywhere from two to six miles, depending, of course, on the age and condition of individual guests. Brandy, our collie, particularly enjoys these parties. He’s right up in front, tail wagging, leading the group.
Following our hike, we set out the fruit and usually sit quietly enjoying our fruit while we listen to a tape recording by some well-known Hygienist; or we simply enjoy each other’s company discussing areas of mutual concern and interest. On these occasions, we ably support one another and that is our purpose, is it not?
You Need Not Be a Master of Ceremonies
Remember that on these occasions you need not be a master of ceremonies. It is better to be a casual host. Succeed with one guest at a time. Take it easy! All people, no matter how important or influential, like every other person who ever lived, need to be recognized. All people have a deep need to be loved, to feel that they are important to others.
Students in Rural Areas
If you live in a rural area and wish to make contact with other Hygienists for the express purpose of sharing thoughts on Life Science and your experiences with it but there are none within a radius of a few miles, you can still socialize in the manner stated with nonHygienists, non-students of Life Science.
One way to do this is to put an advertisement in the local newspaper and on various bulletin boards that may be available in your area to the effect that you are interested in forming a group or club for the purpose of studying natural methods of keeping fit. Be sure to give your name and telephone number.
You may have many calls and perhaps only a few. The number is not important. The idea is to start a group and build numbers because the group is friendly and the subjects discussed both interesting and informative. As the group becomes better acquainted, the other ideas suggested in this course may be introduced and implemented.
Additionally, each student has received a list of names and addresses of fellow students of Life Science. From this list, select a few names of persons who live in your part of the country or even elsewhere, if you choose. Introduce yourself by letter. Tell other students frankly that you would like to correspond with them so you can possibly support them and that you know they can help you. You may be fortunate and find a real friend, one who is eager to share knowledge, personal experiences and concerns.
After contact by letter has been made and you become better acquainted you may even wish to use the telephone for instant give and take of ideas and counsel.
For your mini-groups you can use the information learned in this course to formulate your own basic course of instruction of Life Science for the benefit of your friends. You can purchase tapes by practitioners on various subjects. Each member of the group can be encouraged to participate by purchasing a tape of their own and sharing with the other members of the group.
Health And Fitness Clubs
Health and fitness clubs have sprung up across the nation like mushrooms after the rain. Many of these are quite expensive but they do provide an opportunity to socialize as you exercise, if you can afford it. Some individuals we know pool resources to purchase such a membership and share the membership card from time to time on a regular schedule. At these clubs you can often find a willing ear and an opportunity to share the principles of Life Science.
One of our favorite students called recently to make an appointment for a friend. We were delighted because this particular student has a rare kind of muscular dystrophy which sets her apart from society. Two years ago when we first saw her, her face was covered with black blotches. Her gait was unsteady and she had a tendency to fall from time to time. Additionally, her hands were swollen, puffy-looking, and covered with red blotches. Having no understanding of her condition, people avoided her. She had no friends. On her first visit to the ranch, Dr. Elizabeth went up to her, put her arm around this young woman’s shoulders and kissed her right on her blotchy black face. So, it was with pure delight that this young woman acquired a newly-found friend. You see, thanks to the application of the principles you are learning in this course, this young woman no
longer has those black clotches, she no longer stumbles and falls. She probably never will be “cured,” but she IS presentable. People no longer stare at her or, the opposite, avoid looking at her.
Where did she find her new friend? At a health club! Her friend also needed a friend. She was far from her home in India. She knew not a single soul. She had a need is did our student. Today, they share meals together. Their silence, their resentment, many of their fears have gone. All because each one found a friend and they can socialize together.
The local Y.M.C.A. and the Y.W.C.A. usually have fitness classes which you may attend for a nominal fee. There are aerobic dance classes, jogging groups, hiking clubs. You can use various clubs, churches, hobby groups, and so an to “seed” a like-minded group. Again, advertising your desires is the key to success. Advertise that you will hold a “study session,” or whatever, in your home and see what happens. In all likelihood, you will be agreeably surprised.
How To Advertise
Type up an announcement of your meeting (or party, or hike, or class, or whatever you have decided to host). Use old letters. You can acquire a set of transfer letters of many different styles from a local office supply store. Using these or the typewriter draw up an attractive announcement of the first meeting, let us say, of the SMALL TOWN LIFE SCIENCE STUDY GROUP. Be sure to give time and place and include precise instructions as to how to get to your home or to the meeting room you have selected. Be sure also to include your telephone number so that interested parties can telephone for further details or directions. Use some intriguing phrase or information to encourage interest.
You may also be able to place an announcement of your meeting in a local newspaper. These are usually provided free of charge as a public service by newspapers.
Have several hundred flyers run off and place them in strategic spots throughout the community where you live. If the topic for discussion concerns health, you may find a welcome reception in health food stores. Sometimes librarians will post such notices. Ask various merchants to post them also. The idea is to contact as many people as possible over a sufficiently wide area. Exposure of the right kind will produce results.
Getting Prepared
The first meeting is critical, so be well prepared with a topic of interest. Following is a list of suggested topics. The student will note that we have suggested ten, sufficient for a year’s study, since most such groups disband for at least two months during the summer.
Suggested Topics
- From Measles to What and How to Prevent the What? (The 7 stages.)
- I Like Fruit!
- The Zero-Calorie Diet.
- I Like Being Skinny!
- How to Lose 15 Years off My Face and Add 20 to My Life.
- Body Burn-out and How to Prevent It.
- Why Exercise?
- Is Meat Good for Us?
- Food Combining Demonstration
- How to Plan Meals
You will probably have to carry the load for a while, perhaps for the first two or three meetings. After that, it is time to start assigning topics. Get lists of the available tapes from Life Science or from the American Natural Hygiene Society. These are valuable and can be used at your meetings to fill in gaps and to provide useful information to your guests. The tapes may be used to supplement presentations by yourself or by one of the guests who consents to make a presentation.
Throughout your many lessons there are numerous topics of interest and also discussions by experienced practitioners on specific subjects. These short articles often provide very valuable information. They can be reproduced and a copy given to each guest or they can be read to the guests present. The idea is to choose subjects of general interest or of intrinsic worth, to line up articles and/or discussions which develop the theme, to have tapes that pertain to the topic; in general, to tie the whole meeting together in such a way that there are no awkward gaps. Your guests should leave well rewarded for their time. They should have enjoyed the fellowship and learned something of value.
When they do, they are only too eager to return again and again.
Sealing Friendships within the Group
Most people are lonely in some way or other. Many Hygienists feel lonely—set apart. Meetings such as we have described provide an ideal setting for everyone to have an opportunity to find a friend or to make many friends. The host or hostess can play a useful role here.
At every meeting guests should be made to feel that, as host or hostess, you are delighted to see them. For this moment the idea is to make each guest the center of attention.
Dr. Elizabeth gives every person who comes to the ranch on these occasions a hug and a kiss. They love it. After one or two meetings, indeed, they expect it and so does she!
Both of us try to impart a sense of mutual love and respect. Not everyone is outgoing at first, but with practice, everyone can become more warm and outgoing.Within the group is one person, or even a whole group of persons, who think you are somebody and do not hesitate to show it.
Rid yourself of surface comparisons. Encourage, yourself and your guests to be interested in life and each other. Learn to live through talking, listening and sharing. Use your own loving talent. Plant the seed of love, of mutual caring and respect for others by your example—and watch your harvest grow.
Don’t Try Too Hard
Strive to put your guests at ease, but don’t strive too hard: avoid artificiality. Offer love, friendship and knowledge to your guests. Don’t be afraid to go more than half-way, especially at first and perhaps even the second meeting. Express sincere interest in your guests person and well-being.
Don’t forget the round-the-room introductions at every gathering. Do this when your guests have settled. At times, or even every time, you can ask your guests to tell something about themselves as for example, how they learned about Life Science or how they
became interested in learning about natural methods of health care, or about their hobbies, or special talents, or feelings, or whatever? Be sure to admire and inquire.
When we express interest in others, they become interested in us. The old adage, “If you want a friend, then be one” is very sound advice that is applicable to all of us.
Establish Certain Rules
We have certain rules at the ranch that hold for all guests without exception. You may like to adopt similar rules especially at the beginning when strangers join your group. Two of these rules are the “No Smoking” rule and the “Vegetarian Food Only” rule.
Any guest who wishes to smoke may do so outside and away from the house. We do not put out ash trays. If we see a guest with a cigarette in hand looking for an ashtray, we suggest to him that there are the other guests to consider but they can go outside on the porch or for a walk around the grounds if they wish.
No meat is ever brought or served. Even our meat-eating friends understand this and respect our wishes. At the beginning they usually bring a very complicated salad complete with a very elaborate and especially prepared dressing. They soon change their ways and most become a cooperating part of the group—and willingly so.
We do not permit coffee, alcohol or soft drinks. We always have distilled water available for our guests.
We do not make of parties and meetings a time for hurry-up, busy-ness and cleaning. We try to keep everything casual and light so that we can enjoy them, too.
When Your Group Becomes Too Large
Sometimes a few friends can grow into many and your group becomes so large that your home or the home of participants can no longer accommodate them. Then it is wise and timely either to divide into two or more splinter groups or to move to a public meeting place.
Community rooms are usually available in most areas, provided either by the city or town (for example, the town hall), by churches, lodges, by savings and loan companies, by the larger health food stores, and so on. The local chamber of commerce can often provide names and locations of such meeting rooms, as can the city or country recreation departments.
The Practicing Hygienist
It is true that health care is self care but the practicing Hygienist, worthy of, the name, will realize that s/he has a moral obligation to students and clients to reinforce their understanding and conviction from time to time.
For economic reasons most clients cannot be expected to keep paying in dollars and cents for repeated consultations. Unlike the medical doctor, the Hygienist will have an almost 100% recovery experience among clients. In fact, in many cases, recovery will be so spectacular that clients will be able to depart from guidance within a few months certain, in their minds at least, that they have acquired sufficient knowledge to enable them to continue their forward progress without further guidance from the practitioner.
For this reason, the practitioner must have some method or methods of providing a steady feeding-in of potential clients. Group meetings of clients, their families, and invited friends can provide such a pool.
In the beginning such meetings can take place either in the office setting or be hosted in your own home. These first meetings should be purely professional in intent, to provide reinforcement beyond individual counselling. These meetings are not open to the general public. They do provide a time, albeit brief, for some important socializing, for getting clients to understand that other persons exist who also have problems and, most importantly, that you as a practitioner care enough to give this extra time and without charge.
At times a practitioner who has speaking talents may wish to start a club or group similar to that which we have already discussed. These meetings should, of course, be open to the public. Again, at the discretion of the individual practitioner, they may be held either in his/her home, at the home of a willing client, or at a public community room.
The invitations may be on the personal level (telephone or mail), conveyed by flyers to the public (distributed by cooperative students), and also by notices placed in the public press: Sometimes local radio stations will provide time for a short announcement particularly when the topic to be discussed is of general interest.
Lecture groups of this kind also provide a pool of potential clients but, additionally, they provide an opportunity for socializing. Students and clients are often delighted to be asked to share their experiences with the public. Following the lecture, the practitioner should always provide a time for questions and answers. If you don’t know the answer, say so frankly and then try to find the answer and communicate to the questioner. So, be sure to alert one of your students to write down the name and address of such inquirers.
It is always well at public meetings to ask two students or two other interested people who have the gift of being able to greet people warmly, to be at the door to extend a “Welcome!” to everyone who attends. Always have a sign-up sheet on a table at the door which asks for the name of your attendee, address and telephone number and even “How did you learn about this meeting?” This last information may help you to decide on your most effective means of advertising.
We suggest that between the time of the meeting and before your next meeting that you call your new attendees and thank them for coming. Also, when possible, answer any unanswered questions.
You Don’t Always Have to “Wing It” Alone
The practitioner doesn’t always have to “wing it” alone. Tapes may be used or guest speakers invited. Don’t be bashful about asking worthy speakers to come and address your group. Most of them will be most gracious and willing to come at their own expense. As a general rule we take our guest speakers out for dinner following the meeting.
If a guest speaker is not available and you have been too busy to prepare a topic, do what we have done occasionally: have a “Show and Tell” party. For such occasions we like to meet at a home or at a community room with facilities for serving refreshments.
Many people enjoy telling about their own experiences, about how sick they were, what they did to overcome their particular trouble and “Look at me now!” Potential clients always find such meetings of interest, as do your present clients.
Groups Have a Tendency to Grow
If those in attendance at your meetings experience warmth and togetherness, your groups will grow. When appropriate, then, a minimal fee may be charged. Just a dollar or two will suffice. Whatever sum is collected will be your reward for services rendered.
Volunteers can be asked to take over time-consuming chores, such as getting out the notices of meeting times, place, topics for discussion, collecting “dues,” and similar tasks. There are always willing workers to be found in any group of any size. They only need to be asked. It helps them to feel important, a meaningful adjunct to you and to the group.
Certain people have special talents. If there is a good speaker in your group, request that s/he introduce you. Encourage volunteering among the participants. You will be agreeably surprised at how much help you will receive.
Entertaining
Special Parties
There are many occasions amenable to socializing. We hold parties to celebrate birthdays. We hold parties just to get together with friends. Last year we had a party on Christmas Day for our students. Most years we have our own private plans for the holidays but last year, we knew we would be at home on Christmas, so we decided to have a party!
We knew that some of our local students have no families. We knew also that those persons who do have families rarely extend the hand of hospitality to persons outside of the immediate family group. Personally we feel that we have an extended family, one that consists of our students around the globe. So, we sent out the word: “Come to the ranch and spend Christmas day with us!” We made the occasion a pot-luck dinner, of course. We are not ones to seek after additional work!
On the happy day we had the Christmas tree lights glowing, Christmas candles, flowers and tinsel everywhere. And even Brandy was all dressed up for the celebration with a big red bow attached to his collar.
Everybody was asked to bring an inexpensive gift and to mark it as being a gift for a man or a womans if applicable. Additionally, guests were asked to bring a gift suitable for an elderly person. We planned to present them to the elderly members of the Tucson Yaqui Indian tribe. We were overwhelmed!
We had fifteen guests that day but gifts for the Indians poured in from many unexpected sources. The manager of the produce department of a local Gemco store with the cooperation of the store manager brought us several large boxes of oranges, tangerines and grapefruit. Students who could not attend sent or brought gifts of all kinds: food, clothing, nonsense gifts and practical gifts. In fact, the number of gifts was so large that one of the heads of the tribe had to bring a truck to carry it all back to the Yaqui Center.
And what a time we all had. A Christmas to remember. The food was great. We sang Christmas carols. Dr. Robert played his violin, even though he was out of practice. We had all socialized!
Pick your occasion. Dr. Robert’s birthday is on New Year’s day. Of course, that’s an occasion to merit a party when we are in town. Why not a Halloween party? Thanksgiving time is a lonely occasion for many family-less people. Have a Senior Citizen Party. Guests must be 55 or over. There are ideas without end. You can come up with a few of your own. Partying is fun. Your clients are inclined, many of them, to have periods of depression. A party can be very therapeutic for such as these. A party can provide a time to relax, to have fun, to enjoy knowing your students as persons, to make friends out of faces and cases. And parties provide an opportunity for your clients to know you better, too, as a socially-inclined person, as they meet you out of your office and in a friendly, warm setting.
Entertaining Out of the Home
Sometimes it’s nice not to entertain in your home or in a public meeting room. At times it is pleasant to entertain an intimate, very special group of friends outside of your home. There is a trick to knowing just how to accomplish this satisfactorily. We find there are several ways to do this depending upon just how much you wish to spend for the occasion.
For elaborate entertaining, if you are not restricted economically, you may arrange for special dinners at a better restaurant, one of your choosing. For such an occasion, you
must decide on a menu and make arrangements with the maitre d’hotel of the restaurant or with the restaurant (or hotel) manager at the place chosen. In making such arrangements, you must spell out the menu you have selected item by item making sure that your contact understands that all food is to be fresh, neither frozen nor canned, if at all possible. The exact time at which dinner is to be served must also be understood by the party with whom you are making arrangements, by you and, of course, by your invited guests.
You may wish to have a little gift of flowers for the ladies. Arrangements for either home delivery or delivery to the table can be made; or simply bulk delivery to the restaurant in your name. If the latter, then the host makes the presentation to the ladies who are present at an appropriate time, preferably at the table just prior to the serving.
But, you need not be so formal nor need you be so lavish in your entertaining. Inviting your friends to meet you at a restaurant of your choosing that normally features a well-stocked salad bar with a variety of salads can be fun, too. If the restaurant serves baked potatoes “on the side,” you are doubly fortunate.
Many of the better steak houses boast excellent salad bars and almost all serve baked potatoes. Call ahead of time and choose your restaurant before issuing your invitations. Know precisely what kind of a menu is featured before you all get to the restaurant only to find nothing on the menu suitable for a practicing Hygienist to eat!
Some restaurants and even some cafeterias will set aside a special room or part of the restaurant if your group is large enough, just for you and your party. Many will be happy to make small changes in their menu or even to provide your choices of food if the number present warrants the extra work. They usually make no extra charge for this service and the cost of these meals is generally reasonable.
Some restaurants will be happy to provide your special choices for a small additional charge, too, so keep this in mind. Inquire around and be prepared for those occasions when you don’t care to host a party in your own home. Then all that will be required of you is to put on your best smile and meet your friends at the place of choice. Because you have made the arrangements ahead of time, all you have to do at this kind of party is to enjoy yourself!
Of course the food won’t be strictly Hygienic. You and your guests are well aware of this fact. But, often the enjoyment of spending a few hours away from our daily responsibilities will more than offset any minor defects in a single meal.
Respecting Private Spacing
Every human likes his own space. Around each one of us is an invisible boundary which must not be rudely violated. We know one Hygienist whom everybody avoids. This person is lovely to look at, bright and eager to please and learn, but she has a major fault. She attempts to enter, without permission, into everybody’s private space.
This woman is never content with a “No!” Nor is she rebuffed by other kinds of negative responses. When people turn away from her, she will make a point of loudly asking, “Why?” Why do you do this to me? Don’t you want me around?” She will go on and on asking why, how and where and keep on inquiring even though your answers may be evasive.
If she has a personal problem she will contact every single one in the group to ask an opinion as to how to solve her particular problem, which is, more often than not, of a highly-personal nature. In short, this woman lacks finesse and common sense.
We must avoid becoming too inquisitive, hypercritical or arrogant in our Hygienic contacting. We must learn just how far we can enter into another person’s private space without becoming offensive.
It is far better to become a good listener than to talk too much, to let other people volunteer their thoughts and ideas rather than to attempt to cross that invisible line of privacy. Even practicing Hygienists should learn the art of listening. If you are a good listener, people will remark to others that you are a marvelous conversationalist! And so learned, too!
Remember that a sharp tongue is an asset to no one. A soft answer not only can turn away wrath, but it can charm the listener. Never be hypercritical of fellow Hygienists who may be but beginners, subject to error. Be gentle in discipline and slow to anger. It is important for Hygienists to pull together, not away from each other.
We should at all times in our social meetings avoid becoming arrogant and perhaps even rude. We have often observed this among certain individuals at large gatherings of Hygienists, by self-serving interests who are self-satisfied in their expertise about everything Hygienic. We have observed young people turned completely away from thoughtful consideration of Hygienic principles because a single person cut them off rudely as they asked a simple question.
This kind of arrogance has no place in Life Science. It can frighten off the more timid ones, the very ones who are perhaps most in need of bur concerned guidance and help. We need to be warm and outgoing, considerate of others and, above all, friendly in our contacts with other people. Who knows? They may know something that we don’t know, some bit of knowledge that may prove to be of great value to us at some future time.
Socializing is a time for fun, for finding and making new friends, for stroking, for learning and for helping one another over the bad times. Only by a cooperative give and take in an atmosphere of sharing can e, as individuals, hope to realize the many multiple benefits possible through socializing, with our own kind. Only using socializing for this combined purpose can we hope :o convince others to join with us because we have something so valuable as to merit their attention.
Expanding Local Contacts
Quite often the number of students of Life Science who reside in a particular city is too small for gatherings to warrant the necessary expense of publishing and distributing flyer notices or the hours of thought and planning required to host and conduct a public meeting outside of the home.
If confronted by such a situation, it is often possible to enlarge one’s horizons by including other health-oriented groups in your plans; such groups as vegetarians, vegans, members of a nearby health club and similar groups.
It is often interesting to learn just how many “hidden” vegetarians there are who do not belong to any well-known organization or club. At any rate, one should invite all interested parties to a general meeting for the purpose of hearing a talk on some subject of interest to all who might care to attend.
Various reasons for calling such a group together can also be put forth as, for example, to form a study club on vegetarianism in general; for the purpose of finding out whether or not there are sufficient numbers so inclined who might care to meet on a regular basis for potluck purposes or for dining at a public facility. One can think up various reasons for health-oriented groups to get together for purposes of socializing with likeminded individuals.
Sometimes these joint meetings can be in the form of a day-long seminar with a number of speakers being featured at two sessions, perhaps two speakers in the morning hours and a single speaker in the afternoon followed by general socializing.
Or if your choice is to make the meeting simple, present a single speaker on a topic of interest, topics such as the following:
- How to keep your energy level high.
- How to choose and use foods that burn clean.
- How to keep fit in today’s crazy world! And so on.
In other words, choose a topic of general interest, one hat will attract and intrigue.
It is possible at such meetings to allow a certain amount of time for individuals to relate personal experiences, these being given, of course, on a volunteer basis. Questions may also be permitted if agreeable to these volunteers.
It is often fun to allow time after the lecture or seminar for socializing1 on a more intimate basis, both by groups and, by individuals.
Occasionally, at meetings of this kind, it may be interesting to divide up into circle mini-groups following the lecture presentation for the purpose of discussion of the topic of the day by those within each assigned circle. All such discussions should be preceded by round-the-circle introductions so that all may become better acquainted.
These meetings may become so popular that they can be repeated at frequent intervals. On subsequent meetings, circles should be regrouped so that, in time, everyone will become acquainted with those who choose to become regular participants. The same procedure of becoming better acquainted with each other as detailed earlier in this lesson, that off having individuals volunteer information about themselves, can be followed equally well here.
These circle meetings can prove to be the most interesting and informative way of socializing of all that we have presented. We have seen long-lasting friendships result from these casual meetings. They can prove both creative and supportive. Above all, they offer an opportunity for individuals to participate on an equal footing in groups, small enough to be nonthreatening, even to the most timid.
Good Public Relationship
Public relations is a phrase in common use these days. For the Hygienic practitioner and the individual Hygienist alike, good public relations can best be established through a continuing and on-going effort to promote satisfying social stroking.
While we should not work just for applause, achievement should always be rewarded. Becoming a bona fide working Life Scientist is an achievement of which we can all be proud. Let’s advertise our pride in our knowledge of life’s universal laws and our having come to appreciate the fact that there can be one penalty for error: premature death. We are few among many because we are so blessed.
Let’s encourage getting together for all manner of healthful socializing: for dancing, either aerobic or your style; for calisthenics, eating, hiking or painting; for study and learning; to offer support and to receive it. We all have such a great and wonderful gift to share. There can be no better way to share it than in a spirit of friendly love. The hand of friendship will draw all people closer to life’s joy.
We hope you will try some of the ideas we have put forth in this lesson. We would enjoy hearing from you, about your failures, which will be few, and especially about your successes, which will be many!
Article #1: How to Be Socially At Ease
Let us imagine that you are invited to a lovely party where you will meet strangers as well as people you know. I have decided to make this a tea, as the uncharted casual contacts of a tea party most nearly parallel those of everyday experience.
PLACE YOURSELF MENTALLY BEFORE YOU GO. Before you go to the party it will be well to study your attitude on your relation to other people generally. Right here your inferiority complex—everybody has one of sorts—begins to stir like a waking beast, doesn’t it? So our first task is to put him to sleep again until we can get rid of him permanently.
You can’t have a good time at a party or be charming unless you feel on an equal footing with everyone present. Of course, it would be absurd and stupid to compare yourself with your hostess or host and each guest to see if you are an equal. So we must rid ourselves of these surface comparisons. They are unprofitable and odious.
If a great singer is present, you can’t honestly feel that your voice is as good as hers. If the richest woman in the community is there, gorgeously gowned, how could you feel that you are as well-dressed as she? Unless you are a striking beauty, you can’t honestly feel that you are as good looking as the prettiest woman there. Unless you have a dynamic personality and are a witty conversationalist you can’t even imagine that you are as entertaining as the cleverist woman present. The most popular and beloved woman may be none of these—but she is charming. So why bother with such comparisons?
There is another more important and deeper quality that you can feel which will enable you to mingle easily and enjoy yourself with people above you and below you on the social ladder. It is impossible to keep your social contacts on an even keel. If you lived in a palace and had six secretaries to protect your exclusiveness, you would still meet a number of undesirable people. So you must reach a point in poise and charm where you remain the same regardless of what or whom you contact!
For this type of poise we must have a little philosophy that supports our conviction of equality. There is a danger here that in striving too hard for a sense of equality with the highest types of people one may be a little belligerent and say with a chip on the shoulder, “I am as good as anybody in the world.” The crudeness and bad taste that would prompt such a statement in that mood are sufficient proof that one is not!
FEEL A BASIC KINSHIP WITH EVERYONE. We are all travelling the same path. The only difference in people is that each has arrived at a different place on that same path—but we all have the same feelings and the same reactions somewhere along the way.
So no matter how shy and small you feel, you may know that everyone present has experienced that same thing. If they have overcome it and seem assured, that should only prove to you that you, also, can conquer your self-consciousness. Try to understand that the other fellow has his problems of inferiority, perhaps not just the same as yours, but, nevertheless, just as real to him.
When you are meeting a new person, try to think of the stranger’s problem of instantly adjusting to you—try to help him find familiar ground where he can be at ease. This will accomplish two things. It will take your mind off yourself, eliminating for the moment any possibility of your self-consciousness. (You know you can’t be self-conscious unless you are thinking about yourself!) Then, too, your interest in the newcomer will make him think you are charming. Never be afraid to go more than halfway to establish social ease. Don’t be afraid to walk up to people at a reception or party or tea to say or do something that will make them happier. A wallflower is usually self-elected. She slips through the door and slides into a side seat on the edge of the room as though she were clinging to the edge of a whirling disk and might be thrown off any minute.
NEVER, TAKE THE FIRST CHAIR IN A ROOM—walk calmly well inside and take the most inviting chair hat is vacant!
Pause before you enter the room, see where people are, locate your hostess or whoever is in charge of the affair. Go to her and shake hands. She will introduce you to those landing in her immediate group.
... “Remember that people put the same interpretation on us that we put on ourselves. They take their cue from is! We cannot control the smoothness of life from without—but we can control it from within—we can control our reactions to anything that happens to us. This is poise!
... WHEN WE REALIZE THAT THERE IS A STEADFAST, DIVINE PERSONALITY WITHIN US THAT IS BIGGER AND FINER THAN ANYTHING THAT CAN HAPPEN TO IT, WE HAVE JUST BEGUN TO LIVE. This is when we get up on two feet from the all-“ours of animalism and bewildered ignorance and realize hat we have souls. The experience passes but the experiencer remains to have other experiences.
When you realize the importance of this “experiencer” within you, then you are in a position to develop unshakeable poise. This is not a religious conception—it is an inalterable fact of life. The person that you really are is so basically a part of the harmony of the universe—so established in the world of reality—that you can afford to take our importance for granted and put your mind on others.
When you understand this basic truth, you will become socially unselfed and immersed in sociability. Just to refrain from talking about yourself, not to be patting your hair and clothes and not to patch your makeup in public—these do not guarantee charm. These are but the first baby steps toward charm in being socially unselfed. Charm demands that you be genuinely interested in your companions—you can’t fake it!
YOU MUST SHOW GENUINE INTEREST. You must be so interested in other people that you understand their humanness, stand ready to smile at their arrogance, to fix up their failures, to admire their accomplishments and to ignore their errors. People are fascinating—the most fascinating study in the world! . ... If you can give humanity a mental handclasp of sympathy and at the same time a wink of tolerance, no king nor queen can throw you off poise!
... The desire to be capable of the best self-expression ... is a splendid motive that drives one to sharpen one’s tools for the making of good conversation—but cold perfection will never warm the hearts of your hearers. You must strike the spark of animating warmth born of a pulsing human urge to share what you feel.
This spark comes from the fires of a burning desire to draw closer to the mind and heart of your neighbor, to give him solace when it is needed, encouragement and sympathy always, also laughter to brighten his spirits and to lighten his load. And when I say “neighbor” I do not merely mean that person whom you would like to cultivate for social or material reasons. I refer to every life that touches yours.
From The Woman You Want to Be by Margery Wilson. Published by J. B. Lippincott Co., Philadelphia and New York. Copyright 1938.
Article #2: Real Houses Are Like Real People by Charles M. Simmons
Houses, REAL houses, that is, are very much like people. If you take a look at the houses in your community, you find quite an assortment, don’t you? You see some old ones, some new ones, some shabby ones, and some “smart-looking” ones. There are some you wouldn’t want to live in just because of their appearance on the outside. Others come closer to your choice, except that if they were YOURS, you would make a few changes. Some seem to have charm, while others lack it completely.
It is remarkable what a varied combination of houses make up a community, yet they are all made of the same basic materials. However, keeping that observation in mind, take a second look at those houses, and you will realize that there is another factor that is causing your varied reactions.
It is the amount of love and caring found in the homes, or not found in them, that is evident the moment you step inside. It doesn’t matter if the house is impeccably clean or has that “lived-in” look. These are only outward appearances, and provide no real measure of the family that resides there. We can feel at once whether the house vibrates and radiates love or emptiness.
Article #3: An Excerpt from In Tune With the Infinite by Ralph Waldo Trine
... Many times the struggles are greater than we can ever know. We need more gentleness and sympathy and compassion in our common human life, when we will neither blame nor condemn. Instead of blaming or condemning we will sympathize, and all the more we will:
Comfort one another,
For the way is often dreary,
And the feet are often weary,
And the heart is very sad.
There is a heavy burden bearing.
When it seems that none are caring,
And we half forget that ever we were glad. Comfort one another
With the handclasp close and tender,
With the sweetness love can render,
And the looks of friendly eyes.
Do not wait with grace unspoken,
While life’s daily bread is broken—
Gentle speech is oft like manna from the skies.
When we come to fully realize the great fact that all evil and error and sin with all their consequent sufferings come through ignorance, then wherever we see a manifestation of these in whatever form, if our hearts are right, we will have compassion and sympathy for the one in whom we see them.
Compassion will then change itself into love, and love will manifest itself in kindly service. Such is the divine method. And so instead of aiding in trampling and keeping a weaker one down, we will hold him up until he can stand alone and become the master. But all life growth is from within out, and one becomes a true master in the degree that the knowledge of the divinity of one’s own nature dawns upon one’s inner consciousness and so brings one to a knowledge of the higher laws; and in no way can we so effectually hasten this dawning in the inner consciousness of another, as by showing forth the divinity within ourselves simply by the way we live.
By example and not by precept. By living, not by preaching. By doing, not by professing. By living the life, not by dogmatizing as to how it should be lived. There is no contagion equal to the contagion of life. Whatever we sow, that shall we also reap, and each thing sown produces of its kind. We can kill not only by doing another bodily injury directly, but we can and we do kill by every antagonistic thought. Not only do we thus kill, but while we kill we commit suicide. Many a man has been made sick by having the ill thoughts of a number of people centered on him; some have been actually killed. Put hatred into the world and we make it a literal hell. Put love into the world and heaven with all its beauties and glories becomes a reality.
Not to live is not to live, or it is to live a living death. The life that goes out in love to all is the life that is full and rich, and continually expanding in beauty and in power. Such is the life that becomes ever more inclusive, and hence larger in its scope and influence. The larger the man and the woman, the more inclusive they are in their love and their friendships. The smaller the man and the woman, the more dwarfed and dwindling their natures, the more they pride themselves on their “exclusiveness.” Anyone—a fool or an idiot—can be exclusive. It comes easy. It takes and it signifies a large nature to be universal, to be inclusive. Only the man or the woman of a small, personal, self-centered, self-seeking nature is exclusive. The man or the woman of a large, royal, unself-centered nature never is. The small nature is the one that continually strives for effect. The larger nature never does. The one goes here and there in order to gain recognition, in order to attach himself to the world. The other stays at home and draws the world to him. The one loves merely himself. The other loves all the world; but in his larger love for all the world he finds himself included.
Verily, then, the more one loves, the nearer he approaches to God, for God is the spirit of infinite love. And when we come into the realization of our oneness with this Infinite Spirit, then divine love so fills us that, enriching and enrapturing our own lives, from them it flows out to enrich the life of all the world.
In coming, into the realization of our oneness with the Infinite Life, we are brought at once into right relations with our fellow men. We are brought into harmony with the
great law, that we find our own lives in losing them in the services of others. We are brought to a knowledge of the fact that all life is one, and so that we are all parts of the one great whole. We then realize that we can’t do for another without at the same time doing for ourselves. We also realize that we cannot do harm to another without by that very act doing harm to ourselves. We realize that the man who lives to himself alone lives a little, dwarfed and stunted life, because he has no part in this larger life of humanity. But the man who in service loses his own life in this larger life, has his own life increased and enriched a thousand or a millionfold, and every joy, every happiness, everything of value coming to each member of this greater whole comes as such to him, for he has a part in the life of each and all.
And here let a word be said in regard to true service. Peter and John were going up to the temple one day, and as they were entering the gate they were met by a poor cripple who asked them for alms. Instead of giving him something to supply the day’s needs and then leaving him in the same dependent condition for the morrow and the morrow, Peter did him a real service, and a real service for all mankind by saying, “Silver and gold have I none, but such as I have I give unto thee.” And then he made him whole. He thus brought him into the condition where he could help himself. In other words, the greatest service we can do for another is to help him to help himself. To help him directly might be weakening, though not necessarily. It depends entirely on circumstances. But to help a person to help himself is never weakening, but always encouraging and strengthening, because it leads him to a larger and stronger life.
There is no better way to help another to help himself than to bring him to a knowledge of himself. There is no better way to bring him to a knowledge of himself than to lead him to a knowledge of the powers that are lying dormant within his own soul. There is nothing that will enable him to come more readily or more completely into an awakened knowledge of the powers that are lying dormant within his own soul, than to bring him into the conscious, vital realization of his oneness with the Infinite Life and Power, so that he may open himself to it in order that it may work and manifest through him.
Originally printed and copyrighted in 1908. Bobbs-Merrill Co., Inc. NY. Last copyright 1970.
Article #4: Preparing A Dinner Party For Non-Hygienic Guests by Elizabeth D. McCarter, D.Sc.
So! You’ve decided to take that big step: to host a gala dinner party for some of your nonHygienic friends. It can be done, you know, and without compromising your principles, too! And certainly without all the hours and days of preparation required when hosting a more conventional dinner featuring the usual gourmet type of heterogeneous combinations.
Plan first of all to set a gala dinner table. Get out all your best silverware and fine china. Polish up the candlesticks and plan to dine by candle light. Check your linens and, if need be, see that they are all freshly laundered, ready for the big day. All this routine work can be done days ahead of time.
Plan a centerpiece, of course. This can consist of flowers from your own yard or from the florist. In the fall or wintertime, lovely centerpieces can be made from a wide variety of gourds, pine cones, apples, or whatever. Women’s magazines are filled with all kinds of ideas so go to the library and check a few of them to find an idea most appropriate to your circumstances.
Next, plan your menu. You will be a guest at this party, too, so plan your party with that in mind. Market a day or two before the big event and stock the refrigerator and ripening bowls with various kinds of fruit in season.
Purchase baking potatoes of good quality, several varieties of low starch and green vegetables, two or three kinds of lettuce, some sprouts (or better yet, grow your own) and two or three different kinds of nuts. Pecans are popular as are almonds and cashews, all unsalted and un-toasted. You might plan to have a casserole dish of some kind or even some lightly steamed ears of corn. Be sure to allow plenty of time for bananas and other fruits to ripen as well as the tomatoes and avocados.
The night before your party set your table. If you need some ideas on how properly to set a table, your local librarian can refer you to suitable books to obtain this information. Make it pretty and inviting. Set out the serving trays, dishes and appropriate ladles, tongs and so on.
The morning of your party make your food preparation. Wash and dry the lettuces. Carefully wrap the washed pieces in towels and put in the refrigerator. Scrub your fruits and rinse with pure water. I use a liquid soap that make using Ivory flakes for this purpose. Proceed the same with all the vegetables except, of course, the ears of corn. These should remain intact until dinnertime. All the vegetables can then be returned to the refrigerator.
I usually set up a buffet table, the longer the better, especially if you are hosting a fairly large party of fifteen or more guests. For smaller groups, a smaller buffet, perhaps comprising two cardtables set side by side and covered with a single table cloth would be sufficient.
You will want to have plenty of food available so that your guests will have a variety from which to choose.
Make several attractive fruit arrangements, each plate featuring compatible combinations of fruits. For example, you might place on one large round serving tray: an attractive assortment of strawberries, pineapple slices, kiwi fruit and oranges, all placed on a well arranged bed of Bibb (limestone) lettuce.
On another dish arrange pieces of Romaine in a circle configuration and place a huge mound of assorted grapes on it, perhaps surrounded by schoolboy size red Deliciousbrand apples or, in season, ripe apricots and nectarines or slices of papaya. On a third dish use dark leafy green lettuce and use it as a background for delectable dried fruits: varieties of dates, dried figs, little paper cups of raisins with, perhaps, a star arrangement of bananas to separate the different kinds of dried fruits.
Always try to use the fruits which are readily available in your area. Persimmons in October and November often provide a wonderful treat as do the Bing cherries and apricots which are plentiful in the latter part of June. Some of your guests may have never eaten mangos or New Zealand kiwi fruit. And, believe it or not, many may never have enjoyed the rich succulence of a Medjool date! All exotic fruits provide interesting conversation pieces. Place all the fruit dishes at one end of the table.
Next come the salad vegetables. Get the largest bowl you can find or dig out one of those huge long-unused (we hope), but gleaming, pots that you may have used at one time for cooking. Fill it with a variety of lettuces which you have broken up into pieces. Add tiny slivers of carrots, red and green cabbage, chunks of green and red peppers, broccoli flowers, and strips of cucumber. (I always use the unwaxed pickling cucumbers). Place stalks of celery in a pitcher of your choice and place it near the salad bowl (or pot).
Or, let your guests make their own salads. This is always a good opportunity for questions and answers, too, although now we find more and more people are becoming salad-oriented. If individual salad-making is your “thing,” then place the salad vegetables in individual dishes and arrange them colorfully around a large lettuce bowl. Let your guests help themselves.
Make a salad dressing of lemon juice and olive oil sparked with a dash of walnut oil for flavor interest. Or, make one of cucumbers, celery plus a little avocado—all of which are blended together with a little green onion. Put each dressing in an attractive decanter or in a small serving bowl with a ladle or large dipping spoon. Be sure to put out a salt-free seasoning mixture. Vegebase is an acceptable mixture.
Some guests may request salt and pepper. If so, you may purchase individual salt and pepper shakers at some gourmet or health food stores. The salad part of the meal often provides a time for friendly education in the making of healthful salads.
It is nice always to have quartered or sliced tomatoes and avocado strips on a side dish with either of the salad buffets so that guests who enjoy these fruit-vegetables may add them to their other choices.
If your choice or choices of main dish (dishes) has been baked potatoes or a casserole, or both, these should be timed for the proper cooking time and the oven lighted about 15 minutes before. The potatoes and casserole should be timed as exactly as possible so that they will be ready for your guests when needed. While neither the potatoes nor casserole will be strictly Hygienic, nevertheless some cooked dishes can often provide for your guests a most enjoyable finale to a very enjoyable repast.
There are numerous vegetarian casseroles that will delight the taste. Baked potatoes served with an avocado blend made from avocado, a little distilled water and some vegebase often prove to be a delightful treat. Why not bake your potatoes early in the day, scoop out the contents, mix with the avocado mixture, stuff, wrap in foil and keep in the refrigerator until your guests are ready to go to the table. At that time place the unwrapped stuffed potatoes in the preheated oven. They’ll be heated and ready for your guests at the appropriate time.
If an eggplant tomato casserole is your choice, put it out on the serving table, surround it with an assortment of natural, undyed soft and hard cheeses plus a dish of sliced tomatos and an assortment of nuts. Separate the nuts from the cheeses by using the tomato dish. (The nuts could also be placed with the salad but we find it usually better to place them with an appropriate casserole.)
If fresh steamed corn or other steamed vegetables are to be served, they should, of course, be put out on the buffet along with other suggested main dishes. Steamed corn is always welcome. Most of your guests will want butter with their corn. Buy a quarter pound or so of raw unsalted butter if you can find it in your area. Place it by the steamed corn.
We serve baked corn gems in place of bread. I can make these several days before the party and keep them in the refrigerator. To make these, I purchase freshly ground corn and wheat at a local health food store plus some ground unsweetened dried coconut (or I grind my own). To four cups of corn meal I add 1 cup of coconut and 1 cup of ground wheat. After a thorough mixing I add boiling water to make a dough-like consistency. I roll out the dough in a 4 inch wide strip and cut into two-inch “gems.” I put the gems on baking sheets which have been left to heat in an oven at 400°F. I bake these for about 15 minutes, then turn them over. I then turn off the oven and let the gems cook until the right consistency, about 10 more minutes.
Since the gems are cold when I take them out .of the refrigerator, I sprinkle them with a few drops of distilled water and remove them to the oven for 10 minutes or so before placing them on the buffet table. They are great when eaten with a salad of greens!
For dessert, I usually prepare a frozen fruit delight which I make by pureeing a dried fruit (dates, apricots and apples are a good choice) with a little distilled water and then mixing it with banana “ice cream.” This mixture can, then be placed in champagne glasses or in any kind of fancy glassy covered with plastic wrap, and then put in the freezer until dinner time. When your guests are seated at the table enjoying your stuffed potatoes or steamed corn or your tasty casserole, you can quietly set this wonderful desert out on the buffet.
Good friends, fine food, soothing music, fun, laughter and lively! conversation are boon to the soul. While many errors in eating will no doubt be made by your guests from time to time, nevertheless, they will welcome this kind of friendly introduction to natural foods for good eating. We need this kind of friendly rapport from time to time. There are many serving suggestions, ideas galore, to be found in various books written by hygienists and by almost-hygienists. Hannah Allen’s Homemaker’s Guide is a good one. Of course, we like our own, The Exciting World of Healthful Cookery! and Healthful Living always has some great ideas by Marti Fry. So, don’t think you have to live to yourself. You really don’t! Try some of our ideas and put a little fun into your life. Learn how to socialize Hygienically and even almost-hygienically once in a while. Watch your spirits soar!